


Unconditional

by shannyfish



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Captivity, Character Death, Domestic, F/M, Felicity Smoak as Sara Lance, Gen, Lost Time, POV Felicity Smoak, Parent-Child Relationship, Past Relationship(s), Protective Felicity Smoak, Quentin Lance has lost it, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-08
Updated: 2014-02-15
Packaged: 2018-01-08 01:06:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 31,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1126560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shannyfish/pseuds/shannyfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Quentin Lance stole his daughters away, Laurel and Sara, to keep them safe from Oliver Queen.  Or so he thought.  He really stole away Laurel and Felicity.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Not Soon Enough

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks be to womantwicedead for beta-ing the first chapter. I have been holding this first chapter in my drive for some time now. I figured I'd post it now, but I will be finishing "Another Life", fear not! I had just worked on chapter two for this fic a bit to get my mind on something else. We all need a break sometimes, right?

_“Whatever they grow up to be, they are still our children, and the one most important of all the things we can give to them is unconditional love. Not a love that depends on anything at all except that they are our children.” ~ Rosaleen Dickson_

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Laurel Lance wasn’t normally a person that Felicity was excited to see.  In her head, she was always ‘gorgeous Laurel’.  She was the woman that Oliver had loved for so long, but things just hadn’t worked out between them.  He’d carried a torch for her all those years on the island...and they would try to make things work, but it would end badly in some way.  Now, she was always happy to see Laurel.  It was weird how things changed.  

****

And things had changed a lot.

****

At first, minutes had passed by...and then hours...and then days...and then weeks...and then months…  Felicity had told Laurel that Oliver would come for them.  Felicity wondered if he even knew that their disappearances were linked…  Maybe Laurel’s had looked like she’d moved, but she didn’t know how hers could have looked willing…  

****

“Felicity,” Laurel whispered.  

****

And she was there, at her side and holding her hand.  “It’s okay,” Felicity whispered.  “I’m here…  It’s going to be okay…”

****

“Her name is Sara!”

****

Felicity closed her eyes.  This was how it had been for months…  Quentin Lance had taken both her and Laurel and had locked them away.  He kept insisting that Felicity was Sara and whenever Laurel insisted that Sara was dead, Quentin would go on about how she was alive.  Felicity knew the truth, but Laurel didn’t.  It wasn’t Mr. Lance’s fault he’d lost it.  Felicity was certain that he’d been affected by something and Laurel telling him that she was pregnant was what had triggered it.   He’d taken them away to another state.  When she’d been able to leave the apartment they were staying out, she’d tried to contact Oliver...Mr. Lance always caught her.  Now, no one except him wereallowed to leave and she swore that he’d gotten even more scary and more dangerous.  

****

“She needs a doctor!” Felicity yelled back at him as tears fell down her face.  

****

“I want you to write a letter for me,” Laurel requested wearily.  Laurel had been four months pregnant when they’d left Starling City.  Now she was one month postpartum.  The baby so far had seemed healthy enough, but Laurel had been so weak and sick since she’d given birth.  Felicity had cared for the infant full time and had tried her best to take care of Laurel as well.  “I want Oliver to know--”

****

“He’s going to be here,” Felicity whispered as she squeezed her hand.  “You can’t talk like this…”

****

“It’s been six months…” Laurel whispered.  

****

She wanted to scream and somehow overpower Lance, but she knew that wasn’t possible.  No matter how crazy he seemed, he was still dangerous and could easily take her.  He’d done it before and she’d ended up with what felt like a sprained arm, if you could sprain your arm.  Laurel needed a hospital, at the very least she needed a doctor, but he was okay just letting Laurel die.  

****

“He’s coming,” Felicity insisted.  

****

The baby’s cries interrupted their conversation and Felicity turned towards where the baby lay.  At least Lance had been good enough to go out and buy the supplies that the baby needed.  For that, she knew they were both thankful.

****

“It’s okay,” she cooed as she got up and moved towards the baby.  Felicity carefully lifted the infant and held her close.  The cries subsided as she bounced a bit as she walked over to Laurel.  She positioned the baby so that Laurel could see her face.  “Here’s Mommy,” Felicity told the baby.  

****

Laurel smiled.  “You’re going to be her Mommy now,” Laurel whispered.  She reached out and touched the baby’s face before looking up at Felicity.  “I’m depending on you to make sure that she’s okay...that she gets to Oliver…”

****

Felicity barely held back tears.  “You’re her Mommy,” Felicity insisted.  Her voice broke, but she held it together.  “We’re going to go home.”  

****

She knew the truth though.  Unless Oliver got there soon, Laurel was going to die.  She didn’t know what was wrong with Laurel, but she knew that she needed help.  She was barely eating and she really couldn’t move well.  Her pallor was ghostly and she really had no strength yet.  Felicity swore that she’d just given up, which was why she kept insisting that she promise her things about Oliver and about the baby.  

****

Even though the child was a month old, they’d yet to name her.  Laurel had insisted that the child not carry her name.  Her parents had named her Dinah Laurel Lance after her mother, but she’d always gone by Laurel.  It was less confusing that way.  She’d talked about naming her Hope or something similar…and possibly naming her after Moira Queen.  They’d toyed with the idea of naming her Hope Moira Queen, but ultimately Laurel wanted Oliver to have input on their daughter’s name.  Sara’s name had also come up…  There’d been other names too, but none seemed to stick.  Laurel just wanted her daughter’s name to be beautiful and have meaning...

****

“I need to tell him things, Felicity,” Laurel said and then gasped.  “He’s going to blame himself…  He’ll find a way to…  He can’t just disappear like he did when Tommy died…  You have to make sure that he doesn’t…  He has to be a father...he has to take care of her…  And you have to promise me that you’ll take care of her…”

****

Felicity just couldn’t keep up the hopeful ‘Oliver is coming’ anymore and started to cry.  “Laurel, you can’t leave me…”  She just couldn’t fathom dealing with Lance on her own.  She didn’t know what he’d do if Laurel died…  For all Felicity knew, he’d fly off the handle even more…  “This baby needs you…  She needs her mother…”

****

“You promise me that you’ll be the mother that she needs…”

****

“I-I can’t…  I’m not--”

****

“You’ve taken care of her since she was born, Felicity,” Laurel said all too calmly with a smile.   “You may not have carried her, but you’ve taken the role of mom this last month…  I need to know that you’ll protect her like I would…  That you’ll love her like I would…”  Now Laurel was crying.  She stroked the baby’s cheek lightly.  “I love you,” she whispered to the baby.  She turned her attention to Felicity.  “Tell her all the things a little girl should be told…”

****

“Laurel…”

****

“I know that we’ve never been friends,” Laurel managed to get out.  “But I’m glad you were the one who was with me…  Oliver is lucky to have you…”  She smiled.  “He’s going to need you…  He should have known that before, but he’s not always the smartest when...when it comes to the heart…”

****

“Oliver and I…”

****

“When he comes,” Laurel told her.  “He’s never going to let you or his daughter out of his sight again…”

****

“He’s coming…”

****

“I know,” Laurel said with the smile still in place.  It wasn’t sad, it was almost happy, which terrified Felicity.  This woman who she’d once been envious of because Oliver had held such a torch for her, Felicity couldn’t imagine what the world she’d been forced to live in would be like without her.  She wanted someone else there to try to keep her sane.  “But he’s going to be too late for me…”

****

“Laurel, please…” Felicity cried.  

****

“Ollie loves you,” Laurel told her as her eyes closed.  The smile was still on her face.  

****

She wanted to argue with her and tell her that she didn’t know what she was talking about, but she couldn’t bring herself to do so.  Laurel was dying and Felicity feared that it was imminent.  She looked down at the baby in her arms and tried to think of any way to escape.  Nothing came to mind.  Felicity looked around and knew that she had to figure out something if Lance went crazy...crazier…

****

“He loves you,” Felicity whispered.  “Gorgeous Laurel…  Oliver loves you.”

****

“Not the same...as he loves you…” Laurel mumbled with her eyes closed.  

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Felicity didn’t know exactly how much time had passed, but ‘Little One’ was growing.  Every day, she feared that it would be her last.  Laurel had died that night…  Lance had dragged her body out of there after screaming for far too long.  He’d come back and simply said that ‘Laurel was safe’.  

****

“Sara, I think it’s time that we talk about moving,” Lance spoke up.

****

He didn’t talk to her much, he mostly just sat around and stared at her.  He drank and sometimes when he spoke to her, he did so through yelling.  Every time, though, he called her Sara and she learned to answer to it and to call him ‘Dad’ or ‘Daddy’.  If she didn’t, he flew off the handle.

****

“Where?” she asked.  Felicity was rocking the baby and wishing that he’d remember that she needed to eat.  She didn’t dare bring it up in case it set him off.  Luckily, she had enough diapers, wipes, and formula for ‘Little One’.  The only problem was that Felicity was starting to have balance issues, she figured from low blood sugar.  It had been a couple of days since they’d eaten…  She’d noticed that since Laurel, he hadn’t been as good about going out and getting food…  

****

“Somewhere far away…”

****

“Remember when we lived in Starling City?” she asked quietly.  “I miss that house…”

****

Felicity watched him.  He genuinely looked like he was thinking about it for a long moment.  A mix of feelings crossed his face and she prepared for the wrath that was going to come.  “No!  It’s not safe there!  I have to keep you safe!”

****

“What about Mom?” Felicity asked, her voice breaking.

****

“I don’t know where she is…” he mumbled.

****

“Maybe we could find her…”

****

And for the first time, Lance looked like he was going to go for this idea.  “If she knew you were alive…  Then maybe…”  He paused for a long while.  “Maybe we could be a family again…  She could know her granddaughter…”

****

“Yes,” Felicity agreed.  “We could be a family…”

****

All she could think about was that if they were looking for Dinah Lance then maybe she could contact Oliver somehow.  If she couldn’t, then maybe Dinah could…  At least there was hope with that route.  

****

Felicity was about to say something else when something caught her eye.  Her glasses had been left behind.  Lance had pointed out that she’d always had perfect vision and there was no need for her to have them.  So, everything had been fuzzy.  She’d learned to live with the fuzziness.  But she saw figures at the window.  She wished she had her glasses, though, so she could make them out better.  

****

“You know, maybe we should think about where we could live,” Felicity said.  “Someplace with a backyard…  So ‘Little One’ can run around…”

****

“That doesn’t sound safe…  It has to be safe…  Wherever we go,” Lance told her.  He approached her and he sounded angrier.  She hadn’t meant to provoke him.  “I should have kept you both safe from Oliver…”

****

“It’s okay, Daddy…”

****

“No, it’s not,” Lance went on.  “I could keep you safe now…  Keep you that way…  You and the baby could be with Laurel again…”

****

And that’s when she started to panic.  Carefully, she got up from the rocking chair and moved towards the crib.  

****

Where they’d been staying was basically two rooms and a bathroom.  The front room was most likely supposed to be a living area that had a refrigerator/freezer and microwave.  The bathroom connected to the front room.  And then the back room had two twin beds along either walls and a crib and rocker at the back.  Sometimes the rocker would be pulled out between the two beds though, which was where it was now.  There was a dresser crammed near the door, which mainly held baby things and that was about it since she and Laurel really hadn’t come with much in the way of clothing.  

****

Lance used to leave them alone.  It would just be her and Laurel, and then after the baby came...Laurel had become sick...and Lance hadn’t left them alone since then.  She missed those times.  She missed the quiet.

****

Felicity looked towards the window again.  It was the only window in that room and it was barred.  It was up high, but she suddenly found herself wondering if what she’d saw was a hallucination or if it had really been real.  Who would it have been?  Would they help her?  Would they even care?

****

“‘Little One’’s sleeping,” she whispered as she put herself in between Lance and the crib.  Whatever he thought might fix things, she worried that it was something crazy...something crazy where he might end up killing them both.  Felicity was determined to keep that baby safe.  She’d promised Laurel…  Felicity wasn’t going to let her down.  

****

“Sara, I have to keep you both safe…”

****

Felicity sucked in breath as she peeked back at the sleeping infant.  She needed to be smart about this.  She knew her limitations currently and she knew how Lance got.  She needed to...think like Sara.  She didn’t know Sara well, but she knew her a bit...and she knew her post-island.  “Do you remember the last time you saw me?”

****

“What are you talking about?”

****

“Before you brought Laurel and I here…”

****

Lance looked even more confused now.  “What--  Why does that matter?”

****

“Those assassins…”

****

“I saw you break one of their necks...right in front of me…” he breathed.  For a moment, she thought the old Lance was back.  It was like a blink, she could see a change.  It wasn’t long enough.

****

Silence spread between them and she wondered if he’d taken it as a threat or if he just didn’t care.  Felicity really wasn’t sure how she could hurt him, but she knew that she had to try if he was going to hurt them.  She couldn’t fail in this.  She had to keep the baby safe...and she had to do what she had promised Laurel…  That was it.  This was the time where she knew that she had to act.

****

Grabbing the rocker, she placed it between them, prepared to use it in any way to keep him away from the baby.  Felicity really didn’t know what she’d do with it, but it was all she really had.  “Please…” she whispered.  Tears began to fall as she tried not to imagine the man whom she’d been once used to seeing occasionally.  A man that she felt was a good guy, even if he hadn’t always been on their team.  Quentin Lance had been through a lot...and now, he’d have a longer road to face.  

****

“Get away from her!”

****

The voice was heard before anything else.  She knew that voice.  The doors came down and the Arrow was there.  He wasn’t alone, another man all in black with a gun was right behind him.  Diggle.  Felicity scooped up ‘Little One’ and moved to the back corner of the room, huddling in the corner.  She watched as Lance fought Oliver.  If he only knew...his rage would be so much more than it already was.  

****

“Please, don’t hurt him,” she called.  “It’s not his fault.”

****

She had to believe that.  Quentin Lance hadn’t been like that before.  He had had chances to just break before…  He hadn’t…  Felicity still believed that there was good in him.  Even if they’d been through hell for six months, even though Laurel had died...he still deserved a second chance…  

****

Felicity didn’t know how long they had fought, but eventually Lance just lay on the ground.  Diggle had even used a dart, but it had taken more than that to knock him out.  They both turned to her and the hoods disappeared to reveal two very familiar faces.  “I--I--” she tried to get out.

****

“You’re safe,” Diggle told her as he approached her.

****

“Laurel--” she started to say, but her voice broke and the tears took over.  

****

“We know,” he responded quietly.  

****

“You know we have to go…  The police are already on their way,” Oliver finally spoke up.  

****

It was then that she realized that he’d kept his distance.  Even after he’d dropped his hood, he’d kept from looking at her.  He’d just stood there like a statue.  They knew, though, and Felicity had to guess that he was in mourning.  She could understand that, but she was so happy to see him...to see them both.  Why couldn’t he look at her?  Was he upset that she had been the one who had survived all those months?  Was that it?  He had wished that Laurel had survived instead of her?

****

The sound of sirens cut off her thoughts.

****

“You have to go,” she got out.

****

Diggle put an arm around her quickly and kissed her temple.  “We’ll be there at the hospital...as soon as they call… We’ll be there.”

****

Felicity just nodded as her hand found his.  She held it for a moment before reluctantly letting go.  She knew that they couldn’t be there.  The Arrow or Oliver Queen.  They needed to disappear and pretend like they knew nothing.  

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The hospital was almost worse than the room she’d been held in.  She’d screamed and kicked and tried to get out of the bed that they’d eventually secured her to.  They didn’t understand, she couldn’t let ‘Little One’ out of her sight.  The moment she explained that the child wasn’t hers and was Laurel’s, they’d taken her away.  Eventually, they’d sedated her.  She was fairly sure the line ‘I’ll calm down when you bring my baby back’ sounded pretty crazy after she had admitted that it wasn’t hers.  They didn’t understand.  

****

“How’s Lance?”

****

Diggle laughed.  “So forgiving…”

****

“It wasn’t him.”

****

“You’re right,” he told her.  “He was affected by something in his system.  It put pressure on the area of the brain that controls rational thoughts.  They’re taking care of him now.”

****

“And the baby…” Felicity said, trying to stay calm.  Tears fell anyways.  “They won’t let me see her.”

****

“I know that they were working up tests to ensure she was okay, but other than that…  I don’t know…”

****

“I promised Laurel that I’d take care of her,” she whispered.

****

“Felicity, what you had to--”

****

“That’s why he’s not here, isn’t it?”

****

Diggle was quiet for a moment.  “He’s gone through a lot…  He thinks he failed…”

****

“Because Laurel--”

****

“Because Laurel died and because he couldn’t find either of you fast enough,” Diggle told her.  “We were sweeping through Starling City and The Glades every night…  But there are only so many buildings you can look inside every night…”

****

“We knew you would come...both of you...and Laurel knew that it wouldn’t be soon enough for her, which is probably why she made me promise things I apparently can’t keep…” Felicity admitted and her voice broke again.  She hated that she couldn’t keep those promises…  She needed to.  

****

“What did you promise her?” Diggle asked.

****

“That I would make sure ‘Little One’ was safe...that I got her to Oliver…  That I took care of her...that I took care of Oliver…” Felicity summed up.  She looked at Diggle.  “But he wouldn’t even look at me…”

****

“After we found Laurel…  He thought, like everyone, that you were dead too.  The police were saying that Laurel had been pregnant and she’d probably been killed for the baby…” Diggle told her.  “That the baby was probably sold…”  

****

“You didn’t think anything when Lance was gone too?”

****

“We looked for him,” Diggle said.  “Sara’s been here several times…  She’s looked for them...all of you…  Lance is a cop.  He’s smart even when he’s crazy.  He knew to use cash and to keep out of sight of cameras…”

****

“That’s who he thought I was,” Felicity told him.

****

“Who?”

****

“Lance.  He thought I was Sara.  He told us that he was keeping us safe…  He thought Oliver was going to hurt us…”

****

“I told you, he was messed up.”

****

“I know.  Laurel knew too.”

****

“And Oliver feels like he failed you both…”

****

“Does he know about the baby?”

****

Diggle shook his head.  “I don’t know.  When they found Laurel.  They insisted on doing a DNA test.  The paternity results came up as Oliver.  They investigated and found nothing.  But I don’t know if it’s still hit him.”

****

“I just want to make sure she’s okay,” Felicity told him with a sigh.  “She’s not used to strangers…”

****

“Maybe I can go and see if they’ll give me an update on the baby…” Diggle offered.  “Would that make you feel better?”

****

Felicity just nodded.  What would really make her feel better was if they’d just let her have the baby back…in her arms...and then let her go home.  She wasn’t hurt.  Though, she apparently was malnourished and dehydrated, but she figured that could be fixed with a large bottle of water and stopping at Big Belly Burger.  

****

So, she waited…  

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TBC…

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	2. Seeing the Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on twitter @shannyfish

“You should go see her, Oliver.”

“I can’t,” he whispered.

“Do you even know what she went through when she was brought here?” Diggle questioned. 

His heart felt like a black pit. Oliver had mourned Laurel’s death...he’d mourned Felicity’s...he’d mourned the child that he’d felt like he’d never find. He knew now that Felicity and the baby were alive, but he couldn’t bring himself to see either of them. He just didn’t think that he could function if those walls tumbled down.

“She lost it when they took that baby away from her,” Diggle explained. “And it was because we didn’t know that Felicity had made Laurel promises… They had to sedate her, Oliver,” he said and punctuated each word of his last statement. “She was trying to protect that child. Your child.”

What did he say to that?

He felt bad for Felicity. He felt so incredibly guilty. Oliver knew that he should have found them months ago. They shouldn’t have gone more than a few hours without being found. He knew that Laurel’s death was on him. His daughter didn’t have a mother because he had failed them both. Felicity was probably incredibly traumatized because he’d failed her.

“Oliver!”

“I can’t see her!” he yelled as he turned to Oliver. 

Diggle’s tone was calmer as he stared at Oliver. “Let me ask you something. I want you to answer completely honestly.”

Oliver just stared at him. 

“Do you love Felicity?”

He just turned away from Diggle. That was the most stupid question he was fairly sure he’d ever heard. Why would he ask him that? Oliver just wanted to be left alone. He knew that he should go see Felicity, but he just couldn’t. He knew that he should see his daughter, but he couldn’t. 

He just couldn’t. 

“Seriously, you’re just going to go quiet now?” Diggle asked. 

Oliver didn’t answer. He wondered if he stayed silent if Diggle would just go away and leave him so that he could disappear. 

Smack!

He closed his eyes and breathed through it. He didn’t react. Diggle had just smacked him at the back of the head. It wasn’t too hard, but it had certainly been unexpected. 

“I should beat sense back into you!” 

Oliver almost wished that Diggle would try. He doubted it would work, but then he would feel something else. It would also distract him from all the guilt he felt. He just wanted to get past this part… He needed to go back to his island. That seemed like the best option. 

“You need to at least talk to them about letting the baby being in the room with Felicity,” Diggle practically begged. “She’s going to completely unravel… She needs it. That child could use someone familiar, I’m sure…”

Oliver was quiet. Diggle was right. He couldn’t see them, but he could make their lives a little easier for the night. “Do it,” he barely whispered. “Tell them that they require extra security…” He looked at Diggle. “Would you mind staying the night with them?” he requested. If he couldn’t be with them…he could try to send in a familiar face as well. “Please?”

“Oliver, they would rather it be you.”

“I know,” he whispered. “But I can’t—“

“When are you going to be able to?”

“I honestly don’t know, John…”

“You have to stop torturing yourself, Oliver,” Diggle insisted. “You weren’t to blame in any of this. You need to accept that.”

“I can’t…not yet.”

 

. . .

 

“Mom said that they found the baby and Felicity.”

“They’re at Starling General,” he responded. 

He’d been sitting downstairs not really watching what was on the TV. The TV was just mainly there for the ambiance of passersby. Oliver was fairly sure that it might scare anyone if they came upon him sitting in the dark alone with his thoughts. 

“She also said that you won’t see them.”

“It’s better that I don’t.”

“I know that when they found Laurel that you thought that they were all gone…and you mourned their losses,” Thea continued. “But they’re alive, Ollie! That’s your daughter in the hospital! My niece! And when I found out that Felicity was alive, I thought that you’d be right there at her side—“

“Thea—“

“I remember staying up with you… You telling me how you blamed yourself for their deaths… How you loved Laurel, but not the way you loved Felicity…and how you regretted not telling her! So, why, Ollie, are you here?!”

“It’s better this way, Speedy,” Oliver explained all too calmly. He knew that it didn’t seem to make sense to anyone else. He knew that he should take that as a clue that there was something wrong with his reasoning. It didn’t matter. “Everyone I get close to…”

“Is that your reasoning for keeping your distance?” Thea demanded.

Oliver just stared at her. Thea was angry, confused, fiery, and obviously upset. He was doing it for her benefit too. He really couldn’t bear to lose anyone else.

“That’s BS!” she yelled at him.

It actually surprised him. But Thea wasn’t the first person to yell at him and rant about how his actions were wrong. Oliver just couldn’t bring himself to get close to Felicity and that baby, only to have them snatched away again. He just couldn’t do that.

“Mom says you don’t even care about the baby!” Thea continued. “What happens to her…or who takes care of her…or how or even where she’s raised!”

“Mr. Diggle is watching over both of them and—“

Thea opened her mouth to continue her rant when the doorbell rang. It was late. Oliver could tell that Thea hadn’t been expecting anyone by the surprised look on her face. But maybe it was Roy? Maybe he’d been worried about Thea? Their mother had been in bed asleep for some time, so she wouldn’t have been expecting anyone. They both moved towards the foyer and then the door.

Oliver pulled open the door and his heart sank at who was on their doorstep. He felt like he couldn’t breathe. He didn’t know how he was still even on his own feet.

“We’re sorry to interrupt,” the officer said. “But our captain said you should have these, Mr. Queen.” He held out a manila envelope. The two officers just stood there and waited.

“What is it?”

“Letters addressed to you, Mr. Queen, were found,” the officer reported. “They’re only copies, but the originals will be released to you once the investigation is complete and over.”

Hesitantly, he reached out and took the folder. “Letters?”

“Written for you, Mr. Queen, from Ms. Lance,” the other officer spoke up and explained. “They were found between the mattress and the box spring. The last one, I believe, was found between the bed and the wall.”

He just stared at the envelope. Laurel had written him letters? Oliver hadn’t expected that. He just didn’t know what to say or do with that.

“Thank you, Officers,” Thea said. “We do appreciate the thought in making sure my brother received these.”

The officers nodded. “Mr. Queen. Miss Queen.” And with that, they were gone.

Thea closed the door and put a hand on his arm. “That was thoughtful,” she said gently. “They probably realized that you were going to be up…”

“Here,” he said as he held out the envelope. His hand shook. Oliver didn’t think he could handle reading the words though. What if Laurel blamed him? He already blamed himself. What if Laurel hated him? He already hated himself.

“What? Aren’t you going to read them?” Thea asked. She was obviously shocked and confused by his actions.

“No.”

“Why not?” Thea demanded. She was loud and angry again. “These are her last words to you, Ollie. They’re addressed to you. The police already read them and came out here this late at night to make sure you got them.”

Oliver looked up at Thea. As he stared at her, he couldn’t help but think how she’d changed. Thea was all grown up. He’d missed that. He’d missed five years of her life because of the island and he’d found himself wondering if that really had been for the best. If he hadn’t gone on the Queen’s Gambit. Would he and Thea be the people they were? Or would they have been out of control and spoiled?

“I’m afraid,” Oliver finally confided quietly as he continued to hold out the envelope. His hand was still shaking, he was barely holding onto it.

“Afraid of what?”

Thea still didn’t take the envelope from him. “Afraid of the words…”

“Do you want me to read it first—“

“This…it means I failed…” Oliver told her. “I already know I have, but this…this reinforces the fact.”

The envelope fell from his shaking grasp. It hit the floor with a thud. Nether of them bent down to pick it up in any kind of hurry. Instead, they both stared down at it. 

 

. . .

 

“Did you sleep?”

“No.”

“Neither did I.”

Oliver sighed. “I can’t, Digg…”

“What are you going to do, Oliver? Have you even thought about that? Everyone’s waiting for your decisions,” Diggle reminded him. “What are you going to do with Felicity? What are you going to do with the baby? Are you going to figure out a name for that baby? Are you going to let Felicity take the baby home? Are you taking the baby home so that you, your mom, and Thea can raise her?”

Oliver just stared at him. 

“When are you going to realize that you have to make decisions, Oliver?”

“You want more than that,” Oliver finally spoke up. “Everyone wants more, but I—“

“You’re failing them right now,” Diggle said, beating him to the punch. “Do you think that Felicity understands that you don’t want to see her because you feel like you failed them? No. She thinks you must hate her. Laurel’s dead and there was nothing she could do to stop that—“

“I don’t—“

“You and I know that, but she doesn’t,” Diggle continued. His voice was strong and determined. “You love Felicity, Oliver. We all know that. You’re only hurting both of you by avoiding her…”

Oliver swallowed hard. He still felt like avoiding them and keeping his distance was the best thing to do, but how could he hurt them? Diggle was the one who had been staying with the Felicity and the baby… He knew firsthand if she was suffering. Thea and his mother, the look on their faces the night before. Oliver just felt like none of them understood. But Diggle and Felicity, they had always been the ones who understood and could see him for who he was. There was no pretending with them.

“Laurel,” he started and then paused a minute. He looked down and closed his eyes as he tried to keep his composure. “Laurel wrote me letters… The police found them… They brought them to me last night.”

“What do they say?” Diggle questioned.

Oliver opened his eyes, lifted his head, and looked right at his friend. “She said a lot of things…” He swallowed again. “But she did say that Felicity took care of her and the baby… One letter, she had Felicity write. She was dying and she wanted me to know that Felicity was going to make sure that our child was with me and that Felicity would take care of both of us.”

“What did Laurel say in there about her feelings for you?” 

He had hoped that he wouldn’t push that. Diggle knew him all too well though. He could probably see there was more from just looking at his face. “She said that she loved me… That she thought she understood what kind of man I really was… That even though sleeping together had been a mistake, that our child wasn’t… That she wanted me to be happy…”

“Nothing in there about hating you?”

“No.”

“She wants you and Felicity to be together?”

“Yes,” Oliver barely got out. 

Diggle just stared at him.

“I don’t deserve that,” Oliver blurted out. 

“Oliver, of all the people I know…you and Felicity are two of those people who really deserve happiness…” Diggle told him. “She might drive you crazy, but I think she keeps you sane too…”

“I’m bad for her—“

“Don’t you think that’s her choice?”

 

. . .

 

“You’re not doing it right!”

“Ms. Smoak, I really need you to stay in your bed.”

“She’s screaming because you’re not doing it right!”

“Ms. Smoak, I’ve been taking care of babies practically my whole life—“

“Are we interrupting?”

It was like the world stopped. They were all looking at them. The nurse looked especially shocked. Maybe it was because he’d been brooding in the hallways the night before or maybe it was because he was Oliver Queen. Either way, it seemed like the nurse had forgotten what she was doing. 

“Do you think we could have a few minutes?” DIggle spoke up.

“Su-sure,” the nurse finally responded and nodded before leaving the baby. 

Felicity was immediately trying to get out of the bed, her attention on the baby in the plastic basinet who was still screaming. 

“Hey, I’ve got her,” Oliver said as he put his hand on the blanket that was still covering Felicity’s legs before moving over to the basinet. He stared down at the screaming squirming infant for a moment. She was beautiful. He looked her over and repositioned the diaper a bit before snapping up the outfit she was in. “You’re okay,” he whispered. “You’re safe, Little One.” He picked her up and she immediately was quiet. Oliver cradled her in his arms for a moment as he looked down at her. He swore she smiled up at him. 

“She knows who you are,” Felicity whispered.

“I’m just oddly good with babies,” Oliver told them. He walked towards Felicity and slowly handed the baby over to her. “But I think she’d rather be with you.”

“She’s yours,” Felicity told him. 

He could hear the hint of sadness in her voice. He took a moment before looking at her. She was looking right at him. Her big blue eyes staring at him from behind her glasses. How he’d missed her… She still seemed to be able to see right through him. “I know,” he whispered. “But Laurel said that you were her mom…”

“Laurel?” 

“The police found letters.”

Felicity nodded. 

Oliver suddenly wondered if she’d held out hope that maybe Laurel had been okay. If she had been taken somewhere and saved. Even without their bodies, he’d mourned Felicity and the baby. It wasn’t that he’d wanted to give up. It was that he just couldn’t bear to continue how he had been. 

“Did you read them?” Felicity asked.

He watched her with the baby. Felicity was so good with her. He hadn’t ever thought of Felicity as a mother…or how she was with children. It hadn’t been anything they’d run into. But she was good with her. They looked so natural together… 

“I did,” he whispered. 

“I didn’t know what they all said,” Felicity told him. Her attention was on the baby the whole time. “I forgot about them… After he took Laurel… I didn’t think to look… I was too concerned about what could happen.”

“She said that you took care of her… That she trusted you… That she knew that you were a good person… And she said that you’d taken care of the baby since she was born, that you were her mother…” Oliver filled her in.

Felicity shook her head. “Laurel’s her mother,” she argued. “I was just happy to be there and help out…”

“You sure look like her mom,” Diggle spoke up.

And he was right.

Even though the baby had dark hair, how they were…they looked right together. Diggle had been right about a lot of things. Oliver really did need to make some decisions. He couldn’t be disconnected from them or the world. He needed to be part of it and cope with the pain and anger that filled him. “She still needs a name,” he said quietly.

“Laurel wanted to name her after your mother… Something light and hopeful for the first name,” Felicity told him. Her tone was gentle and quiet and thoughtful.

“Laurel said she didn’t want the baby named after her,” he said aloud more as a statement than anything else. He knew Laurel’s wishes. She’d made them clear. He wouldn’t go against her wishes. And he knew that they really did need to name the baby. He needed to be that child’s father and she needed to know where her home was and that she was loved. He had no worries of spoiling, that was a guarantee.

“Is it horrible to just Google names that mean light or hope or similar names?” Diggle questioned.

“I don’t see any problem in it,” Felicity spoke up. She looked up at Oliver. “Maybe you should hold her while Diggle reads you names.”

Oliver smiled at her. He knew that she was trying to get him to ‘accept’ the baby as his. He had no doubts, he was just trying to ease himself back in. He actually really wanted to hug Felicity and not let her go, but he was still a little scared to touch her…or the baby…afraid that he’d hurt them. Instead, he sat on the edge of the bed and watched as Felicity held the baby. “This is good…” He looked up at Felicity and then Diggle in turn. “I do need you two to help me with this…”

“You’ll know when you hear it,” Felicity told him.

“Let’s just steer clear of names like Blanket and names that are just spelled flat out ugly,” Diggle told them.

Oliver laughed. “You going to weed them out then?”

“Damn right,” Diggle said as he moved closer to them with his phone. “So…there’re virtue names… Hope, Faith, Verity, Honor, Patience, Constance, Temperance, Joy, True… Names that mean hope…besides Hope since I already said that… Asha…skip…Nadine…skip…skip…”

Oliver laughed again. 

“Names that mean light… Skip…Alina…uh skip…Clara…Eleanor…Eliora…skip skip…and Helen…another skip…Lucy…Nora…”

“Wait,” Oliver spoke up suddenly. “Lucy…”

“You like it?” 

“It’s simple…and pretty…” Oliver said. He looked at Felicity. “Right?”

Felicity smiled at him. “Do you really like it?”

“I think so?”

“Lucy Moira Queen,” Felicity said slowly as she looked down at the baby.

“It sounds good, right?” Oliver asked and was looking between them. 

“I think it’s beautiful…” Felicity told him as she looked from the baby to him. She stared at him for a moment. “Are you sure?”

He thought about it for a moment. He thought Lucy was pretty and he thought that Laurel might like it. There was also the fact that it started with an ‘L’ like Laurel’s name. Oliver looked down at his daughter. “Lucy,” he repeated as he stared down at her. It fit. At least he hoped it did. He was sure that his mother and sister would tell him later…though he had a feeling that Thea would love it no matter what her name was. 

“Glad that’s figured out,” Diggle said. “Now, we just need to figure out if they’re going to release you two…”

“But where will I go?” Felicity asked. 

Oliver could see the sudden worry in her. He remembered what Laurel had written and what Diggle had said. No matter what Felicity said, she was that child’s mother, even if it wasn’t a biological connection. “We’re going to go home…to he mansion…at least for tonight,” Oliver said. “We can figure everything out later…”

“I don’t know if---“

“Don’t worry about anyone else right now,” Oliver told her. He knew that she hadn’t ever seemed comfortable in the mansion and there was the general scare factor of his mother. Thea wouldn’t hurt her…unless she wouldn’t let her hold Lucy. 

“Okay,” Felicity said quietly. “But I’m thinking we’re going to have to stop and get some things.”

“Like a car seat,” DIggle spoke up. “I’ll get one of those while you get them discharged…” He headed out of the room without another word. 

“I have no idea what to get a baby…” Oliver told her. “I’m going to be useless…”

“Thea’s younger than you.”

“True,” Oliver said. “I know they need love and attention and baby food and milk and bottles and blankets and diapers…”

Felicity smiled at him. “No baby food yet.”

“See.”

“But she will need bottles, formula, blankets, diapers…and clothes…and a crib…maybe a swing… She likes to be rocked,” Felicity told him.

“I can be taught.”

“Oh, I know…”

“I missed you,” he whispered suddenly as he stared at her. 

“I missed you.”

 

. . .

 

TBC…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my Riley for helping me with the name!


	3. Accepting Life How It Is

“I thought you hated me…or you were mad at me…or blamed me…or—“

“I could never hate you, Felicity,” Oliver told him matter of factly. “I may get mad at you from time to time…but never enough to hate you…” His voice was very quiet. “I don’t blame you for Laurel—“

“You shouldn’t blame yourself, either,” Felicity responded quickly. 

“Felicity—“

She was quiet, but she was thoughtful. “I don’t blame you, Oliver,” she told him. Felicity walked over to where he stood by the window. They were in the room that Thea had declared the nursery the night before. Felicity was fairly sure that Oliver’s sister was out buying everything in the world for decorating a girl’s nursery. “Laurel didn’t either… So, you should stop blaming yourself.”

“I think it’s easier said than done,” Oliver told her honestly as he glanced to the side to look at her.

Felicity smiled at him. It was odd seeing him again after all of those months. Everything, really, was almost surreal…she felt like she was in a dream… She appreciated the fact that she wasn’t in the hospital, but she hated being across the hall from Lucy. Felicity knew things were going to change, though, and that scared her… Today, though, she was focusing on them being safe. She knew that she had to be thankful for that. 

“I know what you mean,” she whispered.

Oliver turned his body towards her and fully looked at her. “You don’t blame yourself, do you?”

“I did,” she admitted. “At first…”

“It’s not—“

“I know,” she said as she put a hand up. “But I am trying really hard not to spiral into some kind of depression or panic…” Felicity hated to hold things inside. She believed in being truthful, even if it oftentimes just spilled right out. It wasn’t healthy to keep things inside. 

He just stared at her.

She was sure that he hadn’t expected her to say that. She should be overjoyed by being safe and home and with the people who care about her. She should be happy that the baby she’d cared for was reunited with her family and actually had a name. Felicity knew that she didn’t have to worry about what Lance might do to her, though she did still worry about him. It wasn’t that. It was the future and the unknown and how things would have to change. She wasn’t ready for that change.

“I was held captive for months… I had to pretend that I was Sara Lance… I had to keep it together all of those months… For myself, for Laurel, for Lucy…” Tears fell down her face as she stared at him. Her voice broke here and there as she spoke. “We knew you would come… We did…” She paused and tried to breathe. “Things have to go forward now and I’m terrified of where that leaves me…”

“What do you mean?” he asked as he reached out and rested a hand on her arm.

Felicity closed her eyes for a moment as she sucked in breath. She opened them again and she could tell that he was so worried about her. “What about Lucy?”

“What do you mean?”

“Is she staying here? Are you going to take care of her?” she asked quickly and then paused. “Will I be able to see her?” That’s really what broke her heart. The idea that things might drastically change… 

“Felicity… I’m not going to keep you from her… And as for the rest, I just don’t know yet… I figured that we could figure that out…”

He and Laurel had both said that she was Lucy’s mother, but ever since they’d gotten to the Queen Mansion, she hadn’t felt like that. She understood that Moira and Thea were excited to welcome a new member of their family and to probably have Oliver back to a non-moody state, but she was used to being the sole caregiver of Lucy. 

“I just… I have so many questions…so many worries about what’s going to happen…what’s coming next,” Felicity blurted out. 

His other hand came up and his hands held her upper arms and he just stared at her. “I don’t want you to worry… I want you to talk to me… We’ll figure everything out, Felicity… I don’t want you so upset about things that haven’t even been decided yet.”

There was a knock at the door and they both looked over right as it was opening. It was the nursery, so it wasn’t like there needed to be privacy. Moira Queen seemed a little confused to find them both there.

“I didn’t realize that anyone was in here,” Moira said. “I was just checking on my Lucy…”

Oliver just smiled. “Felicity just put her down a ten minutes ago.”

“I see…” 

“I should go,” Felicity said suddenly. She felt so awkward in the mansion and especially around Moira. Thea she could handle. Thea was a ball of happy energy. Felicity had actually been shocked when Thea had hugged her when they’d come home earlier that day, but it hadn’t been a bad shock. She moved away from Oliver and towards the door. 

“I thought we were going to talk more?” Oliver questioned. 

Felicity moved past Moira and stopped at the door, she just smiled at him. “We can, later… I’m going to go find Digg… Give you two some space…”

She left before he could argue and it was hard for her. The distance probably hurt the most for her. It stabbed at her heart and she had trouble feeling like she could breathe. Felicity felt like she was always in this state of panic since she’d been separated from Lucy. She knew that she needed to try to get past it though. The Queens were Lucy’s family, not her. 

“Where are you going?”

She stopped and turned to see Digg. She’d passed right by him. “I was—“

“You okay?”

Felicity shook her head. There was really no use in lying to him. She could hide things from Oliver a little easier if she wanted, but never from him. John Diggle could see right through all of them. It was only worse now because the three of them had become so close. “I—I was just looking for you…”

“Let’s take a walk,” he suggested as he held out an arm and then pulled her to him. He walked them out of the mansion and out onto the grass out back. It seemed that he knew his way a lot better than she did, but then Diggle spent far more time everywhere that Oliver went than she did. “This is about Lucy, isn’t it?”

“It’s hard for me to be apart from her,” she admitted. 

“I know.”

“And I don’t know where I’m going to be tonight or tomorrow…or anytime after that…” she went on. “Do I still have an apartment? I think my lease was already up! Do I have a job? Do I have to worry about hospital bills? Do I still have a place at the Foundry with you guys? Do—“

Diggle stopped her and turned her to face him, his hands on her shoulders, much like she’d just been with Oliver. “You’re going to be with us… Tonight and tomorrow I think you should stay here…even if it makes you uncomfortable… I’ll be close by if you need me, you know that…” He paused. “As for everything else… Oliver and I boxed up everything in your apartment. Oliver has it all in storage, he didn’t know what else to do with it. As for Queen Consolidated, Oliver has had temps this whole time… I think it’s driven his mother and Isabel crazy… But all three of them always find flaws with each one… None of them were you, Felicity. And I wouldn’t worry about the hospital bills, I think Oliver’s taken care of everything…”

Felicity at least knew a few more answers to her questions than she had before. Diggle had a good way of calming her down and reminding her that she wasn’t alone. She had a family with him and Oliver. She didn’t have to worry about everything on her own because between the three of them, they’d work it out. Felicity just finally nodded and looked down. She really didn’t know what to say. It was just good to hear those things from him. Good to know that the world wasn’t crumbling around her. 

“Let’s keep walking,” he said a moment later with a smile and wrapped his arm around her once again before they headed off away from the house. 

“You have no idea how much I missed being outside,” she whispered after they walked for a few minutes. 

“I can imagine…”

“At least I wasn’t alone,” she whispered as she looked over at him.

“It still had to be hard,” Diggle told her. 

Felicity was quiet as they walked. It really was nice to have the time with Diggle and though she kept thinking about Lucy, she tried not to dwell on the fact that she was so far away from her right now. “It was easier when Laurel was there,” she admitted. “But like I said, we knew you’d both come…well, I knew that you’d both come…”

“We look—“

“I know,” she said as she stopped and turned to him. “I’m going to tell you the same thing I told Oliver. I don’t blame you. I knew you’d come. I know you both tried… Lance didn’t even take us out. He locked us up and didn’t let us out… It wasn’t like that helped with clues…”

“I still wish things had gone differently.”

Felicity just tried to smile for him. “I know…me too… I just keep telling myself that I can’t keep thinking about the past… Have to think about the future…”

“Which is why you’re having a hard time coping with not knowing…” Diggle said as he nodded. She could tell that he was getting it. She appreciated him understanding that. Even if no one else understood, Diggle always did, which made her life a bit easier.

“Yes.”

This time, Felicity turned on her own and started to walk again. She hadn’t planned what she’d do when she got to finally leave that room… All she’d thought about was seeing them again… About trying to help Oliver be a father to the baby she’d cared for. That was it. Okay, so maybe she’d expected some things…mainly Oliver’s arms around her…and going back to her job and her life working on Team Arrow. It was all fairly simple stuff. 

“You know, things are going to be okay… We will figure everything out…”

“I know,” she said all too cheerily. 

 

. . .

 

The truth was, no matter how she tried to keep herself from spiraling out of control…she felt it inside of her. Things weren’t right. Felicity felt like she was probably making it all more difficult on herself. She couldn’t sleep. It was her second night in the house and she just couldn’t sleep. Felicity had cried for some time, both out of general upset and out of frustration, and then finally got herself up and out of bed. She had a baby monitor in her room, but Lucy had been sleeping fairly well. 

So, instead of checking on Lucy, she walked through the house. She hoped that it would make her tired. That she’d maybe be able to actually sleep… The kind of sleep that she hadn’t had in months… Okay, so Felicity was fairly sure that wasn’t going to happen any time soon. 

She stopped when she heard the TV going. She hadn’t expected to run into anyone in the house. Though maybe it was Diggle? He was staying at the house and he was security… She wouldn’t be surprised… So, she slowly approached the room, looking for who was still up…

“Felicity?”

Oliver.

Felicity hadn’t expected him to be there. It made sense, she supposed, but why didn’t she think that? A moment later, she saw him sitting there on the couch. He was getting to his feet and it was then that she noticed that he had the baby monitor with him. She wondered if he was really just as worried about Lucy as she was. It brought a smile to her face immediately.

“Can’t sleep?”

“No,” she admitted as she walked towards him.

The lighting must have betrayed her because she hadn’t expected what he asked. “Were you crying?” He sounded so concerned and worried. 

Felicity couldn’t lie to him about this.

“Yes.”

“I—“ he said and then stopped. His mouth hung open for a moment and then he closed it. He seemed to be thinking about what he was going to say next. “Diggle spoke to me after dinner…”

Oh God. Felicity started to panic slightly. She hadn’t thought that Diggle would tell Oliver about everything that they’d discussed, but sometimes Diggle did what he thought was best for both of them. 

“Oliver, whatever Digg said—“ she started, but he interrupted her.

Oliver held up a hand and then spoke. “Diggle said that he thought that we needed to figure things out… The three of us. He’s right. We do. I had just wanted to give you time to settle back in… I didn’t want to rush you…” He was quiet for a moment. “I didn’t want to push you back in if that wasn’t what you wanted anymore…I would understand if you didn’t.”

“I want things back to the way they used to be,” Felicity admitted. “Well, mostly…” She looked away for a moment.

“Mostly?”

She could feel the blush rise in her cheeks. Why did she have to be so damn honest with him? He knew how she felt, or at least she thought that he did. This, she wasn’t going to spell out for him right now. Either he knew or he didn’t. That was it. “I just…I…” Felicity stopped and looked up at him again. “You know…you owe me…a hug…” She held out her arms for him. 

He didn’t even blink. He just took her into his arms. She rested her head against his chest. His arms wrapped around her. It was like instant comfort. How she’d wanted these arms around her for so long. She wrapped her arms around him in turn and clung to him. Felicity had dreamt of this here and there, on those nights where she’d thought the world was going to crumble down on her…only to wake to the sounds of Lance screaming at God only knew what. 

Out of nowhere, the tears fell, and she clung to him even more. 

Felicity’s sobs filled her own ears. She’d been crying since the hospital, but it was like the first time that she knew that it was all real. It was the first time that she actually really got to be alone with Oliver…that they’d both had time to really absorb everything…and she’d just needed him. 

“You’re safe,” he whispered.

She knew.

That was the one thing that she knew right now. She was safe. Felicity had wanted this for so long…and at first, she thought it would never happen. But here they were…and she was crying her eyes out. She probably looked ridiculous. Felicity finally released him and took a couple of steps back, her gaze still downward as she wiped at her eyes. 

“Hey,” he whispered and he stepped towards her and reached out, his hand cupped her cheek.

Felicity looked up at him slightly. He looked concerned and that was it. He didn’t seem to pity her. She wished that things could be simpler right now, but they just weren’t. She sniffled and took in a breath. “I…”

“Do you remember when I told you that I didn’t think it was a good idea to be with someone that I could actually care about?” he asked.

Felicity remembered. Her heart had practically broken when he’d told her that…after the whole Isabel walking out of his room with her dress unzipped fiasco… “I told you that I thought you deserved someone better.”

“You were right,” Oliver told her. He moved closer to her still. A hand moved through her hair. “And I thought I’d lost her before I had the chance to tell her… I was afraid… Afraid of what might happen if I got too close…if I loved someone…”

She just stared at him and was hyper aware of exactly how close he was. “I think she should have a choice in that…”

He was staring right into her eyes and he seemed even closer, if that was possible, without their bodies touching. “It took me a long time to finally decide that you’re right…she should…” He was quiet for a moment. “After we found Laurel, I was afraid to keep looking… The police declared you and the baby dead too… I didn’t want to remember you like that… So, maybe I didn’t look as hard as I could have—“

“Diggle said that you both looked for me…and you found me, Oliver…not the police,” Felicity told him. She knew that he hadn’t stopped looking for her because he and Diggle had been the ones to find them. “I’ve always told you that I had a choice in things, Oliver…even if I didn’t have a choice when it came to what Lance put me through…I would have gone voluntarily just so Laurel wouldn’t have had to be alone if I had known what would happen…” 

They just stared at each other in silence for a while. Felicity was soaking in the words he’d said and those she’d said. It was all the truth, though. All she could think was: where did this leave them? The future was something that she was worried about still, so that made this even more of a hot button topic. 

“I want you to stay here…in the Queen Mansion,” Oliver suddenly spoke up quietly. 

She thought about it for a moment. She really wasn’t sure how she felt about that. “I should go apartment hunting…” she said quietly.

“You don’t have to.”

“As much as I would love to stay here close to you, I don’t think other people would approve in this house…” she whispered. Okay, so mostly Felicity was thinking about Moira Queen. 

“It doesn’t matter—“

“This is their house too, Oliver,” she said gently when he seemed to get worked up. Moving into her own place scared her though because that meant leaving behind Lucy. She didn’t feel like she’d be able to follow through with what she’d promised with Laurel if she was so far away, but at the same time she didn’t think she could stay in the mansion under the irritated eye of Moira Queen. Felicity didn’t quite know why Moira disliked her so much, but she did… That was clear… Maybe it was because she didn’t feel like Felicity was good enough for Oliver or maybe it was because she didn’t like how closely she’d bonded with Lucy. 

“Felicity, please…please stay…”

With Oliver, he was definitely sleeping under his parents’ roof, but then at the same time…it was a little different when it was the mansion. It was so large and they seemed to all live there fine, though it wasn’t like Thea and Roy were married. Felicity was sure that Thea spent plenty of time at Roy’s place instead of sleeping at the mansion. She just couldn’t see it working. 

“I’ll stay another day or so,” she promised. “You should have time without me here as a distraction…”

“Felicity…you’re the good kind of distraction…”

She blushed, but looked down at the floor. “You should be bonding with Lucy…and I’m not helping with that…”

“You’re the one who’s taken care of Lucy since she was born. You’re the perfect person to be here to help me learn what I need to…make sure I’m not screwing it all up…”

Felicity looked back up at him. “I saw you with her, you’re not going to screw anything up…”

“I could put the diaper on backwards.”

She smiled at that. “I think that’s happened to everyone once at least…”

“Stay,” he begged. “You don’t have to distance yourself from us…”

“I wish you were right,” she whispered and tried to hold back the tears. “But I’m not her mother… She’s not mine… And I think my being here and still thinking that is making things more difficult with your—“

“Don’t worry about my mother,” Oliver interrupted.

He knew.

He’d seen it.

She didn’t know if that made a difference though. She didn’t want to make problems between him and his mother. That was the last thing that she wanted. “She’s your mother, Oliver…”

“She doesn’t understand our relationship,” Oliver said. “Which is my fault… There are too many secrets…”

“I know they’re not easy for you to keep from them,” she whispered.

“But if you’re right, if I do deserve to be happy with someone I know I can really love,” he said. “Then, she’ll have to accept us… Accept things how they are…”

Felicity stared at him. “What are you proposing?” she barely whispered.

“I’m not proposing anything…nothing more than being honest…as honest as I can be with the world,” Oliver told her. “With you.” A hand ran through her loose hair and another was on her cheek again, his thumb brushing against it. He leaned in and his lips caressed hers. For a moment, that was all, but then she was kissing him back with fervor. “Please…” he whispered against her lips when they finally parted to breathe. 

That kiss, she felt, had been a long time coming…for both of them. Her hands ran along the sides of his face as she smiled against his lips. “You should ask more often like that…” she breathed.

He smiled and leaned his forehead against hers. “Does that mean ‘yes’?” he asked. “You’ll stay?”

“As long as it doesn’t cause a rift with your family.”

“Not going to happen,” he said quickly as he pulled her into his arms. “And it’s really not about them… It’s about us…and Lucy…”

As if on queue, Lucy’s cries echoed out of the baby monitor. They both turned towards it and then immediately started to move. Oliver snatched up the baby monitor and they both headed back in the direction of the nursery.

Felicity just hoped that this worked. For all of them. 

 

. . .

 

TBC…


	4. Conspiracy Theory

“Please tell me that you did the smart thing?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Which tends to be our problem.”

Oliver sighed and shook his head. “Or I could be avoiding your line of questioning.”

“I think it tends to lean more towards you being oblivious to what’s really going on,” Diggle told him. 

“You’re talking about Felicity,” Oliver said just to prove him wrong. They were both at the Foundry. Felicity had wanted to come, but they’d agreed to wait a bit. They needed to work out a schedule or figure out where to set up baby equipment down in the Foundry that wouldn’t interfere with any of the work areas. Felicity had seemed a little bummed to stay home, but when he’d left she’d been happily rocking Lucy. 

Diggle started to slow clap.

Oliver just glared at him.

“What? It’s only been how long? I mean, I practically had to throw her at you…”

“I wasn’t that bad.”

“Yes, you really are…”

“I don’t want to hurt her,” Oliver told him. “Look at what’s happened in my past—“

“This isn’t the past, Oliver… This is the present and we’re talking about the future…and I think it’s something that you should let her have a voice in,” Diggle said.

“Did you two have a meeting?” Oliver asked suddenly as he sat down in the computer chair.

“What?”

“Felicity said that too.”

Diggle shook his head. “Oh, yeah…I forgot to mention that you missed the ‘conspire against Oliver’ meeting,” he said sarcastically. He was serious again a moment later. “You know, just because sometimes Felicity and I tell you the same thing…that doesn’t mean that we had some kind of meeting…it could just mean that we’re both onto something…”

“Or you two could be conspiring against me,” he teased.

Diggle just smiled in response. “So, what are you going to do?”

“She’s going to stay at the mansion for the time being.”

“And she’s okay with that?”

Oliver really was starting to wonder if he’d talked to her beforehand just so he had a million questions to ask him. He knew that Diggle meant well, but at the same time…he thought he was doing okay. “I know she’s a little hesitant…”

“Your mom doesn’t seem to be her biggest fan,” Diggle pointed out.

“She’ll come around.”

“Too bad there’s not some other building like a small house or apartment on that estate…” Diggle said as he walked the length of the Foundry.

Oliver listened and twisted around in the computer chair. He stopped at Diggle’s words. “There are some other buildings on the estate.” Of course, Diggle already knew that. “I don’t even know if the water works…or they have power though…”

“I’m just saying…then you could be at the house, but not in the house,” Diggle suggested.

And it was smart.

“Why didn’t I think of that first?”

“You’re not used to thinking outside of the box.”

Oliver really didn’t feel like that was true, but maybe it was to a certain extent. He had to think about so many options, keep on his toes, when he was on the island and then before he finally came home to Starling City… He wondered if he’d gotten too comfortable… Maybe he’d relied on Felicity and Diggle too much, but then...was that really so bad? They were a team...but maybe he just needed to widen his perspective on the world…

“I thought I was.”

“Well, then I must think outside the box you think you think outside of…” Diggle countered.

“Cute.”

Diggle smirked. “So, what are you going to do?”

“I’ll talk to my mom tomorrow about remodeling one of the smaller buildings on the estate. I mean, we might as well use it… It’s sort of sad that we have those buildings and we’re not using them.”

“What were they used for before?”

Oliver shrugged. “Servants’ quarters or something…”

“Maybe you could come up with better use for them,” Diggle suggested. “I mean, really… The mansion is massive and the Queens are a rather small family…”

“Don’t start any line like that with my mom,” Oliver said quickly. “She’ll expect Thea and I to have ten kids each…”

“Well, one down,” Diggle teased.

“Thanks.”

 

. . .

 

“Oliver, be reasonable!”

“Mom, I really don’t think I’m being very unreasonable… Lucy and I will still be on the grounds, we just won’t be here in the main house…” he tried to rationalize. “It’s really a good option, Mom. It’s better than us moving away into our own place--”

“Why would you do that?!”

Oliver sighed. “I’ve been trying to explain to you--”

“This is about that blonde girl, isn’t it?”

“Her name is Felicity,” he told his mom. Oliver’s tone was a little stern. He was getting a little tired of how irritated his mother seemed to be with Felicity. He had thought that she’d at least be a little more understanding. Maybe he just needed to be flat out clear with her. 

“She’s your assistant, Oliver!”

“I love her, Mom!” he shouted back and then stopped. Oliver was shocked at his own words. He knew how he felt, but he hadn’t just come out and said it before. It made it more real was all. He hadn’t expected to say that to his mother before to the person he loved. He just stared at the shocked look on his mother’s face. It was sort of satisfying. But at the same time, he really knew he couldn’t care what she said. He needed to talk to Felicity… 

“Oliver--”

“No, that’s it, Mom… You should think about it… You’re here all alone without Thea or I here… Wouldn’t it be nice if Felicity, Lucy, and I were here? Maybe even Thea and Roy would be up for moving here if I got another one of the small buildings up and running…”

“Those buildings are so small,” Moira said. She sounded sad and almost like she pitied the buildings. “They’re smaller than one of those homes in The Glades…”

Oliver shook his head, a smile on his face. “They’re just big enough, Mom… I went out there and walked through one… Besides battling the spider webs...it’s just enough space. It’s not like we’re going to live in squalor…”

“I just--I really need to just think about it… We can talk about this later, right?”

Oliver nodded. “Sure...sure…”

A long quiet moment passed between them before his mother finally turned and headed back up the stairs. Oliver let out a long sigh before turning and heading in the direction where Felicity and Lucy currently where. He stopped when he made it right outside the room and found Felicity standing there, tears falling down her face and looking rather upset.

“Felicity…” he breathed. 

“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop,” Felicity rambled. “I was just coming to ask you something...and then I heard your mom...and I wasn’t going to just stand here...but…”

“It’s okay,” he said softly.

“I told you that I didn’t want to come between you and your mother,” Felicity told him.

“How much did you hear?”

“Most of it.”

Oliver just stared at her, he was trying to think of what to say. He’d hoped that she’d missed most of it. It wasn’t that he was embarrassed or ashamed of what he’d said… He’d just wished that he’d been able to tell her that he loved her to her face rather than her just overhearing it. “I...I didn’t want you to hear it that way…” he whispered. 

Felicity smiled a little sadly. “It’s okay… It’s not like it was a complete secret.”

“Wait--”

“You’ve felt like that for longer than since you found us, right?”

“Right,” Oliver said a bit slow. He was trying to follow her train of thought and he wasn’t connecting the dots the same way she seemed to be. “I’m still confused.”

She smiled at him. “You know how I feel about you, right?”

He nodded. “Yes…”

“I mean, maybe it started off as a crush…” she told him, talking with her hands as she took a step towards him. Felicity blushed as she continued to talk. “But...you know that I’d do anything when it comes to you, Oliver…”

“Yes.”

“And you’d do anything for me?”

“In a heartbeat,” Oliver admitted. 

“You may not have said it before, but your actions...they’ve been there,” she told him. “Long before you told your mother that you loved me.”

It didn’t sound so weird coming out of her mouth. It actually made him smile. It was like she’d really made it all so real for him… Like she’d taken the awkwardness and uncertainty out of the possibility of them and out of them as a family… He stared at her. He knew her. He did. She was his Felicity… She saw right through him… She spoke with her mind and her heart… And she was the mother of his daughter, even if she wasn’t biologically so… They had this complex and maybe even odd relationship, but that didn’t matter. It worked for them and to him, it was perfect. 

“Good news, though… I think my mom’s warming up to the idea.”

“Which one? You sprucing up one of those house-things or of me being here?” Felicity asked.

He smiled. “Both.”

“I doubt that.”

“She’s going to learn to love you,” Oliver insisted. “I think she’s just afraid that my feelings for you are going to somehow equal you stealing Lucy and I away from her…” 

“That’s the last thing I want.”

“And she’ll figure that out.” Oliver paused for a moment. “But my mother is a stubborn woman--”

“Well, you had to get it from somewhere,” she teased.

Oliver chuckled. “The point is. It has to be something that she comes to realizing without being pushed there… Everything really has to be her idea…”

“You’re racking up the points for mama’s boy,” Felicity joked with a grin.

He shook his head. “Anyways… You said you were coming to talk to me about something?”

“I had just wanted to find out if it would be possible for me to take Lucy out...just for a walk...once she’s up, I mean…” 

“Of course. You don’t have to ask…”

“She’s technically not--”

“She’s yours.”

“She is.”

“On her birth certificate--”

“I want you to adopt her.”

Felicity just stared at him.

“It’s what Laurel would want.”

“The Lance family… You know, they don’t even all know what’s gone on.”

“Dinah and Sara think the baby’s dead,” Oliver admitted. “There was next to no hope of finding her if she was sold on the black market or something… We looked--”

“Well, it probably didn’t help that that didn’t actually happen,” Felicity pointed out.

“True.”

“But they might not appreciate me adopting Lucy,” Felicity said. “Even if it was something that Laurel wanted… Plus, it’s so soon…”

“Laurel would have wanted it. I know it.”

“No offense,” Felicity said quietly. Her tone turned sad and she looked right at him. For a moment, he was worried that tears would fall. “I don’t mean to sound horrible, but Oliver, you weren’t there… You can’t know that…”

“The letters… They’re pretty clear about what she wanted for Lucy… How she felt about you… How she hoped the future would go,” Oliver told her. “You should read them.”

Felicity shook her head and looked down for a moment before looking back up at him. “Too soon,” she whispered. The tears really were threatening to fall.

“Okay,” he whispered. Oliver hadn’t meant to upset her so much. When he’d first been handed the letters, he hadn’t thought that he’d ever be able to bring himself to read them. And then he read them and everything had been so emotional… But sometime after that, it was like the world had clicked in all the right ways. Everything had seemed to make sense. “But if--when you decide you want to read them…I have them…”

She smiled at him, it was so sad. “I appreciate that.”

“So, I was going to go into QC…”

“Oh?”

“I thought it might be a good idea…”

“Having a job is kind of a good thing...you know for normal people…”

“Right.”

“But you’re not normal.”

Oliver smiled. “No, but I should try to act normal, right?”

‘Right! Have to keep things normal-ish…”

“Are you going to be okay here?”

“You mean without you protecting me from your mother?” she asked. She seemed actually amused by that idea.

He thought about it for a moment and couldn’t think of a better way to phrase it. “Yeah…”

“I’ll survive…”

“Diggle--”

“You should take him. You may need him.”

“You’re sure?”

“I promise not to fall apart or do anything to piss off your mom while you’re gone…” Felicity told him.

Oliver just stared at her. He really didn’t know how serious he should worry about her ‘falling apart’ or her mental condition. He didn’t think that she was crazy or that her emotional state was really something to worry about, but he wanted to be there if she needed him. After all, she’d been through a lot and everything that she’d been freaking out about had been normal as far as he felt. 

“You’ll call though if you need anything?”

“Of course,” she said and he could tell that the smile she was pushing forward was for his benefit. 

Now, he really was rethinking the idea of going into work. He needed to do it though. He needed to straighten out his life. She was his anchor and she was back again, while she was gone he’d allowed himself to slip out of being a responsible adult. That was easy when you were a billionaire and your night job was as a masked vigilante. Not showing up for a job that your family owned was fairly easy… 

He couldn’t do that. 

Not anymore.

He was strong, he knew that… 

It really had been a long time since he’d let his emotions get the best of him. He’d shut down. He had to be stronger than that. It wasn’t for his own benefit, but for the benefit of the ones that looked to him and expected him to be better. 

“I hope that you two have a good walk,” Oliver told her with a smile.

“You should come along tomorrow…” Felicity told him. 

“Where?”

They both turned. Oliver hadn’t heard her come in, but he figured that was most likely because he’d been so focused on Felicity. “Felicity is going to take Lucy out for a walk once she’s up from her nap.”

“I was hoping to steal you and Lucy away for some shopping,” Thea told them. “I guess you can come too, Oliver,” she said. He could hear the slight irritation and reluctance in her voice.

“Doesn’t she have everything she needs?”

“Absolutely not! She’s a Queen! Plus, a baby needs more than a crib and some things… We need a swing and a mobile and a ruffle for the crib and--”

“Okay, okay…” Oliver said holding up a hand. “I’m afraid I’m going into Queen Consolidated so I’ll have to pass on the shopping trip.”

Thea didn’t look displeased with his response. She actually seemed rather thrilled by it. She looked to Felicity. “You’ll come, right? The three of us will have so much fun! Plus, you and I have to hang out… Bonding time… It’ll drive Oliver nuts.”

Oliver just frowned. Maybe he wouldn’t appreciate this. 

“I...guess…” Felicity said a bit hesitantly and quite slowly. “If it’s okay with Oliver…”

“You two do whatever you want...but I want you taking Diggle with you,” Oliver told them. The last thing that he wanted was for them to be out in public with Lucy and for something to happen. The media had already started up a stir about Lucy. They hadn’t come out and said that she was Oliver’s child. They just didn’t feel like it was necessary or needed to start a media storm like that. 

“I thought he was going with you?”

“I’ll be okay.”

“Oliver--”

“Felicity, you know I can take care of myself… I’ll be fine,” he told her.

“Not when it comes to everyone…”

Oliver frowned. He knew exactly who she was talking about. She didn’t seem jealous, but he knew that she didn’t like Isabel and Felicity just never got along with her. That didn’t matter though. His plan was to steer clear of Isabel and to just see what he could do as far as work went. And if he happened to run into her, he planned on keeping her at arm’s length. 

“I would feel better if I knew Diggle was with you,” Oliver told them. “I’d rather you have security and I’d rather it be someone that I know I can trust,” he clarified a moment later before they could argue that any other security person could go with them. Diggle would likely not be thrilled, but he was sure that he’d understand. Diggle would look out for all three of them like he would. That was what he wanted. Oliver didn’t think that he needed to apologize for being protective of his family. 

“Okay,” Felicity finally said. 

He nodded and then pulled Thea into a half hug. He kissed the top of her head. “Have fun, Speedy… Try not to spoil Lucy too much…”

“Ollie, I looked it up… You can’t spoil babies… It’s a myth,” Thea told him.

He smirked. “All the things that you buy...they should be able to fit into a room. A normal size room.”

“Easily solved...give her a bigger room…”

He sighed and let Thea go before moving to Felicity. Oliver thought about it for a moment and then decided not to care that Thea was there. He pulled Felicity into a hug, holding her close for a long moment before finally releasing her. He kissed her forehead and smiled down at her. “Good luck,” he teased. 

Felicity just smiled in response. 

“I mean it,” he said, trying to sound serious. He looked over at Thea. “Speedy here is an expert shopper and you’ll be lucky to be back before dinner…”

“We’re taking an infant out, I hadn’t planned such an extensive outing…” Thea said quite seriously and she even sounded a bit irked at his comment. “I’ll save that for when she’s like five…”

“So kind.”

“Plus, a couple of hours will be just enough time for Felicity and I to exchange all kinds of stories about you…” 

“I really think this is a bad plan,” Oliver half teased. Of course, he was half serious. He was fairly sure that nothing Thea could say was going to scare off Felicity though. She’d been through a lot with him. If his attitude hadn’t scared her off, then he doubted any skeletons from his past would...especially the ones that Thea knew about. At least he didn’t have to worry about Felicity sharing too many stories as most of them would relate to their night jobs. 

Thea shook her head. “Just go.”

“Diggle’s still going…”

“As your spy?”

“He might have stories,” Felicity told Thea.

“I really don’t like where any of this is going…”

 

. . .

 

TBC…


	5. Afraid

Thea really was harmless. She was absolutely excited about Lucy and she was already the extremely loving and doting aunt. Of course, she got to hear her share of stories from Thea and Oliver’s childhood, but it was good… From Thea, it made Oliver seem more like this person who had a normal life… It was really a nice change from the playboy Oliver Queen that tended to be how the media sometimes still portrayed him. Even though she and Thea had very different personalities, they seemed to do well with shopping for Lucy together. 

“Oliver is going to hate it,” Thea said gleefully.

Felicity just smiled. 

“It’s so girly… I wonder if Oliver ever thought about having a girl…”

“You two seem to be close… I don’t see why he wouldn’t,” Felicity spoke up. She was sure that Oliver just never thought about having a family of his own in general. 

“We were...growing up… Not as much since he’s been back,” Thea told her. “Which I guess is understandable… Stuff happened to him on the island… I’m sure he’s told you stuff…”

“Not really,” Felicity said honestly. She was sure that Oliver had talked to Diggle about things that happened, but Oliver was quiet about that time. He’d made it clear that it had been a time in his life where nothing good had happened and that it didn’t matter now. He was a different person. “Oliver is really quiet about that…”

“You two seem oddly close…” Thea added.

Felicity looked over at her. Thea seemed confused, or maybe she was trying to figure out how that was possible? She was about to open her mouth to try to come up with a good explanation for how that was possible, but Thea spoke up again.

“I see you with him...all the time… You work with him at Queen Consolidated and then I’ve seen you with him and Diggle at Verdant…” Thea said. “My brother can’t need you both that much…”

“Well, Diggle is there to keep him safe,” Felicity said. Of course, Oliver Queen really could keep himself safe, especially when he was equipped with his bow and arrows. But how did you explain that they were a team and they had other responsibilities without giving away who they really were and what they really did? “And...well, let’s face it, Oliver can’t keep his own calendar without someone prodding him…”

“True.”

“I guess Diggle and I just sort of clicked with him.”

“You never call him Ollie,” Thea pointed out.

Felicity shrugged as she tried to busy herself with putting away the new clothes that Thea had insisted that Lucy needed away. “He’s never been Ollie to me,” Felicity responded. It sounded weird calling him that. “That’s what everyone who’s known him since he was like five calls him… I’ve only known him for such a short time--”

“I just figured since you two are so close…”

“He’s always been Oliver Queen to me,” she said as she looked over her shoulder at Thea, who was carrying around Lucy. Felicity had observed several people call Oliver ‘Ollie’ and most of them were women that grew up with him. Thea, Laurel, and Sara all did… But her relationship was so much different than his with any of them. So, she really didn’t feel right calling him Ollie. Plus, Ollie sounded like a five year old… Okay, maybe she’d reserve it to try calling him that next time he acted like he was five… It was worth a try anyways…

“Is it weird that I want to know what your intentions with my brother and niece are?” Thea asked. Felicity turned to her, obviously thrown by the new line of questioning. She and Thea had had such a lovely time out and there’d been questions here and there, but nothing like that. “I mean, I know that you’re close to Ollie and that you’ve taken care of Lucy since she was born… Ollie said that Laurel considered you Lucy’s mother because of everything that happened… But I guess I’m trying to figure out--”

“If I plan on being Mrs. Oliver Queen?” Felicity asked. 

“Actually, yes…” Thea said slowly. “Don’t get me wrong. I’d love to have you for a sister.” 

Thea got really quiet. “But?” Felicity prompted. 

“But,” Thea said with a slight nod. “I don’t want Oliver to get hurt… He’s been through so much… He lost out on a lot when he was on that island… He’s still not the Oliver I remember, I mean...I know he’s different, but--”

“I didn’t know Oliver before,” she said. “But I think he’s a better person.”

“I guess sometimes I forget the trouble he used to get into… I can’t really judge because I went through a rough patch too…” Thea was quiet again. “I just miss being close to him… He was never secretive with me before.”

“We all have secrets,” Felicity told her. “Sometimes we need to have them. Oliver just seems to have more of them than the rest of us.” She paused for a moment. “As for my intentions… I’m not planning on becoming Mrs. Oliver Queen anytime soon. Honestly, I think Oliver and I are still figuring things out… But I want to be close to Oliver and to Lucy… Hopefully you understand that?” She liked Thea, she did. Plus, it was nice to have an ally in the Queen Family, besides Oliver. But she could understand if Thea wasn’t okay with things. It didn’t mean that Felicity and Oliver were going to do things differently...but it was good to know.

“I get it… Sometimes Roy acts weird...off...you know? And even though we’ve been together for a while…I still feel like Roy and I are in that...we’re not sure period… Plus, we’re young…I know, but I guess it’s just complicated.”

Felicity smiled. “Complicated. I think that’s the perfect word for my relationship with Oliver.”

Thea smiled in return. “By the way, I know my mom can be hard on you...but she’ll warm up…”

“I hope so.”

And Felicity really did. It was hard enough being back and being in a hostile environment, it would be much harder if it was long term. Slipping back into things in Starling City was going to be hard enough, she didn’t need Moira Queen on her case as well. There was just so much that she knew she had to face coming back that she didn’t think she could face anymore obstacles.

“And by the way, once Ollie does get that shack outside fixed up, I’ll be more than happy to go paint swatch hunting and shopping for everything else you might need to make it look like a place to live in.”

“That’s...sweet,” Felicity said finally. She knew that the Queens lived in a different world than she was used to, so she knew that getting used to how Thea saw the world was just going to take some time. Oliver could be like that sometime, all about the Queen money, but normally with her he was just a person...a man, a very good looking muscled man...even if he was Oliver Queen and the Arrow. And he was a hero. But most of that was a secret, and it was one that she was happy to keep.

 

. . .

 

“You’ve been quiet today.”

“I’ve been thinking…”

“Thea told me that you two bought a lot of baby things today,” Oliver said. “Did things not go as well as my sister played it off to be?”

“No, it’s not that…”

“She also mentioned something about not needing to rush into things,” Oliver added. “And something about shopping...and how I get no input…”

Felicity just stared at him for a long moment. She wondered if Thea had said anything more. Maybe she really couldn’t talk to the younger Queen or perhaps she just thought she was ‘helping’. “I have no idea what she’s talking about,” Felicity lied quickly and looked away from him for a moment. She got up from the rocker and went to check on Lucy, who had fallen to sleep only twenty minutes before. She’d been pretty much hiding out in the nursery in hopes that no one would find her. Though, Oliver was okay. 

He smiled, she wondered if Thea had said more. 

She’d just tried to be straightforward with his sister, after all, she’d hoped to gain favor with someone else than Oliver in the family...and the family wasn’t that big. How she wished Walter was still married to Mrs. Queen, then she knew she’d have points there...or at least she thought she would. 

“I was hoping we could walk out to the building that I’m looking to restore… I was hoping maybe you could even help me…” 

“Sure...right...of course, though, I’ll warn you… Power tools have a life of their own when they’re in my hands,” Felicity told him quietly as she walked towards him. “It’s like they’re possessed…”

“I promise to protect you from them, then…” he said. “There might be some fun demolition… You can swing a hammer… Just pretend whatever we need to break is me when I screw up,” he teased.

She just smiled as he led her out of the nursery. She looked back over her shoulder for a moment. She really wasn’t used to going too far from Lucy. It was hard. 

“Don’t worry, my mother’s in the house… I told her that we’d stop by and let her know we’re stepping out so that she can go sit with Lucy,” Oliver told her.

“She’s probably going to nap for a while…”

“Well, then we’ll have some time to check things out outside…” 

It was nice to think that they could start making headway towards this place that was theirs. She knew that his family didn’t quite understand things, but she hoped that they’d all accept her. Maybe it would all come together once she and Oliver knew exactly what was going on between them. For now, though, she just wanted to stay close to him and Lucy. 

After he’d talked to his mom, they’d made their way out behind the house. “You know, I tried to convince Diggle that he should stay on the grounds too… Then everyone would be close by, but he just looked at me like I was crazy and told me I was funny…”

“Sometimes we all need space,” Felicity told him.

“I understand that.”

Oliver led her to the little house, it was about the size of a very small house. He unlocked it and when the door opened she could smell that the house had been closed up for some time. She waited until Oliver entered first before following him in. It really had been a long time. He led her through and pointed out the rooms and what he thought they could be used for. It was three bedrooms, which perfect for them. As much as Felicity would love to curl up in a bed for Oliver, neither of them were at that point in whatever their relationship was. There was a very small kitchen, which they agreed was perfect because they really mainly needed room for a sink, fridge, microwave, a coffee maker, and perhaps a toaster. They weren’t concerned about an oven or a stovetop. After all, the main house had a big enough kitchen for all of them. There was also a small dining area attached to the kitchen area, just big enough for a small table and a few chairs. The living room was a good size and was what you walked right into. The little house had one bathroom, which Felicity knew would be interesting for them to share, but she was up for the challenge...she hoped she was anyways.

“I know it’s not much.”

“It’s perfect,” she told him. Felicity was quiet for a moment as she examined the rooms she could see from the living room area for a moment.

“We don’t have to do this, if you’ve changed your mind,” Oliver told her.

She turned to him and could tell that he was worried. Maybe he thought she’d changed her mind or that this was just too much. Maybe it was too much, but where else could she go? She wanted to be close to him, but there was no way she could remain in the main house of the Queen Mansion. It was too much with his mother. She knew that she’d been fairly silent throughout his whole tour, but that didn’t mean that she didn’t like it...it was just so much to process and to really realize that this was going to be them. They were going to have this domestic relationship that she hadn’t thought they’d ever have. 

It was surreal.

“It’s not that…” she whispered. Felicity didn’t know why she was whispering, it just seemed right. The house was quiet and empty and it just seemed right. “I just…” She was quiet again. “I want this, I do…”

“But?” he asked, she noticed that he’d quieted his voice as well. 

She nodded. “But… I’m afraid,” she told him truthfully. 

“Felicity, if this is about my mother--”

“No,” she said and then stopped. “I mean, she’s in that mix of what could go wrong… But that’s not what comes to mind first.”

Oliver closed the short bit of distance between them, his hand rested on her arm and he stared at her. “We don’t have to do this…”

“I’m afraid of how things will be between us with so much of our time being together,” Felicity said. “I’m afraid that I’ll screw things up somehow and I’ll have to be distanced from Lucy after I’ve been so close to her… I’m afraid that I’m going to continue to fall in love with you and that it will somehow mess things up… I’m afraid that I’ll mess things up at the Foundry…” She took a moment to take a breath. “And then there’s the fact that your mother doesn’t like me…”

“You don’t have to be afraid,” Oliver whispered. He cupped her face with his hands. “Let’s face it. If someone’s going to screw things up, it’s going to be me. You and Diggle will be mad at me. Eventually I’ll figure it out and I’ll apologize the best I can…”

Felicity smiled at that. 

“So, see...you don’t have to be afraid.”

“But you and Lucy…” she said as her hands snaked up his arms. “I’m just--”

“You’re everything to us, Felicity,” he told her. His voice was full of truth and passion. She wasn’t used to him speaking to her this way. 

She felt like she couldn’t speak suddenly. She opened her mouth to speak and then closed it again. Nothing seemed right. Felicity felt like her response had to be perfect to that statement. What could she say that was just right? How could she convey exactly how much they meant to her. Didn’t they know? Felicity was fairly sure that they knew.

So, she kissed him.

Her hands were on either side of his head and she was up on her tip toes. She kissed with all the passion she had for him. As if this was their first and last kiss. Felicity thought of all the times Oliver was hurt or she thought he was dead...and she channeled all of that into the kiss...all of the relief and love that she’d felt for him. 

When they finally parted, she sucked in breath and stared up at him as she lowered back to the ground. Her mind raced as she waited for some kind of sign that that was okay. It had felt okay. Her mind kept telling her that it was wrong, though. “I--” she finally started to ramble.

“Shh…” he whispered before his lips met hers again. 

Here they were kissing like there was no tomorrow… Tears fell down her face. Felicity wasn’t sad, though. She was so happy. They’d been close before, but she’d never thought they’d be here… But they’d both let walls down to allow the other in… Now they were standing in the middle of a living room that they’d soon be sharing with a child that Oliver wanted to declare as theirs… 

Life really was like a dream.

Just as long as it stayed like a dream…

That’s one of the things that she feared.

That it would transform into a gruesome nightmare...

“I love you,” he whispered as they parted once again.

“I love you…”

How had those words become so easy for both of them? Felicity didn’t know and right now she didn’t care… Things seemed to be falling into place. She had to remind herself to breathe suddenly as she stared at him. 

It was perfect.

The dreamlike state in that living room was soon broken, though. Life really wasn’t perfect. His phone sounded first and he’d let it ring, then hers rang. Oliver laughed suddenly and she couldn’t stop the smile that crept onto her face. “I’m thinking Diggle,” Oliver said before he retrieved his phone from his pocket.

Felicity did the same, but managed to pick up the call before it went to voicemail. “Digg. What’s up?”

“What are you two doing that’s so important that you can’t pick up my phone call?”

She stopped and looked around. There were shutters on the windows. How did Diggle know? “How--”

“Of course you two are together…” Diggle said. “He’s at Queen Mansion… You’re at the Queen Mansion…”

“Right.”

“I was hoping that Oliver...or both of you would be up to that night job…” Diggle said.

“Isn’t it a little early?”

“Crime doesn’t stop just because the sky isn’t dark.”

“Of course...right,” she said and suddenly felt very awkward. “I’ll tell Oliver...and one or both of us will be there…” She hung up the phone and then silently cursed when she realized that she hadn’t said goodbye before hanging up. She hated when people did that.

“Arrow business?” Oliver asked.

Felicity nodded as she slipped her phone back into the pocket she’d had it in. “He wasn’t specific on what the actual crime that needed to be seen to though…”

“You could come into work,” he said quietly. 

She’d thought about it. It was tempting. She wanted to. Felicity on one hand was really excited to getting back to how things used to be, but on the other she was very attuned to where her responsibilities lay...especially when it came to Lucy. She still had some guilt because of Laurel… “Not yet,” she told him. “I’m not ready.”

“Okay,” he said with a nod. “When you’re ready…”

“You should go.”

This meant that she was going to be left behind with Moira Queen in the house. She was doomed. Felicity knew that she could hide away in her room, but she’d have to run into the matriarch sooner or later… She really didn’t see it going any better than the other times she’d run into her or had to speak to her or anything…

He turned to go and she couldn’t stop herself from speaking up. “Oliver?”

“Yes?” he asked as he turned back to her.

Felicity stared at him for a moment as she went over what she was about to ask him. Was it right? How hard would it make things? Was it necessary? But she knew that if roles were reversed that she would want to know. “Have you tried to contact Sara? Or Dinah?”

“No.”

“You can’t keep Lucy a secret… They deserve to meet her… To know that not all of Laurel died… They deserve to know that Lance might have snapped, but that he thought he was protecting Laurel...and me, well...Sara. He thought he was protecting Laurel and Sara...and the baby…”

“I just didn’t want things to be harder on you until things settled down around here,” Oliver told her. And she understood that, but they needed to put Lucy first. Felicity knew that in this, she couldn’t come first, no matter how much Oliver wanted it that way. 

“If you don’t contact them, then I will,” she told him. 

Oliver nodded and sighed. “Okay. I’ll try to contact Sara...and I’ll call Dinah tonight… She’ll probably be here tomorrow, but I have no idea if Sara will come.”

“She’ll come.”

“How can you be so sure?”

Felicity shrugged. “Lucy is all that’s left of her sister… She’d want to see her niece, even if it’s only for a few minutes… Sara would also want to know what happened, why her father did what he did…”

“They still have Lance confined at the hospital,” Oliver spoke up. “Psych hold as far as I know… They’re monitoring him… I haven’t checked on him the last day though…”

“He wasn’t himself. He wouldn’t have done that…”

“He wanted to protect his family… Anyone can understand that.”

Felicity stared at him. “I’ll see you later?”

He nodded. “Call me if there are problems…”

She smiled. “I’ll just try not to be the cause of any…”

Oliver walked back over to her and kissed her forehead. “It’s going to be fine… I’ll see you in a few hours…”

Felicity knew better. Arrow business would take hours and hours of his time. “Are you going to come kiss me goodnight?” she teased.

“I just might…”

“Then,” she said with a smile. “I’ll be waiting…”

 

. . .

 

TBC…


	6. You're Supposed to be Sleeping

Felicity had fallen asleep in the rocker in the nursery while Lucy was fast asleep in her crib. He’d expected to find Felicity in bed, but here she was. He’d also not expected to take so long. Things had taken longer than expected. It just couldn’t be helped. He knew that Felicity would understand. Carefully, Oliver picked her up and cradled her in his arms as he made his way towards her bedroom. She stirred a bit in his arms and he’d look down to check to see if she was awake, but she had stayed asleep the whole short trip to her room. 

Laying her down on the bed, he sighed and looked her over. He wanted her to be as comfortable as possible. He slipped off her flats and dropped them on the floor where he hoped that she wouldn’t somehow fall over them. Oliver wasn’t sure how she’d sleep in her clothes, but he also didn’t want to cross any boundaries by undressing her, even if it was to her undergarments. Instead, he carefully rolled her so that he could pull the covers down and remove the cardigan she was wearing. 

Once she was finally tucked into bed, he gently ran his hand along the side of her face and brushed the stray hair away from her face. Oliver removed her glasses and set them on the bedside table. He leaned in and kissed her forehead. “I love you,” he whispered. 

He sat in there just watching her sleep for a long while. He was worried about her and worried about what was going to come… He’d talked to Dinah Lance on the phone, she’d been away on work and had just gotten in. He’d had to break the news that her ex-husband had been the one who had taken not only Laurel, but also Felicity. He’d tried to explain the best he could that it really wasn’t Quentin Lance’s fault, but she’d been so upset he didn’t know if she understood that or cared. When he’d finally gotten to the part that Felicity and the baby had been found, he’d thought that the call had been dropped. She was going to be in Starling City later that morning and she was going to want to see Lucy. Dinah Lance’s visit could likely test them all… 

Then there was the fact that he’d sent word to Sara that they’d found the baby. He’d not been able to take to her, but left her a message. He had no idea if she’d actually call ahead and say she was coming or if she’d just show up...if she did show up. Oliver really didn’t know. Starling City might be too hard to face for her after Laurel’s death. He would just have to wait and see what happened…

Lucy started to cry softly and Oliver immediately reached out to silence the baby monitor on her nightstand when she started to stir. She needed sleep. “I’ll get her,” he whispered. In all honesty, Oliver didn’t have one on one time with Lucy under his belt. He knew he could do this though. He’d watched mainly Felicity do everything. He didn’t think it could really be that hard. So, he left her bedroom and headed back to the nursery.

“Shh… Shh…” he tried to hush as he approached the crib. He checked on her before moving to mix a bottle of formula for her. He squinted at the directions just to make sure he was remembering how to mix it correctly before putting the bottle together. Setting it down, he scooped Lucy up out of the bed and rubbed her back. “It’s okay, Sweetheart…” She was still upset and Oliver knew that there was something that Felicity did before feeding her when Lucy got up. He needed to change her diaper. 

It seemed to take him so much longer to go through all the steps that seemed to take Felicity and even his mother no time at all. Maybe women had some kind of superpower when it came to babies… He didn’t know. All he knew was that he’d thought that Lucy’s cries were going to wake the whole house up before he could even get her changed. 

Finally though, he settled into the rocker with her. He tried to position her the best he could and she eagerly took the bottle. Oliver had left the light off when he’d entered, so he could just see her by nightlight. He figured that it was more conducive to Lucy falling back to sleep if he left the harsh main light off anyways. “There you go… Life isn’t so bad…” he told her as he stared at her. 

He never wanted this… Not since he’d come back from the island. It wasn’t that he didn’t like kids or want them…or a family for that matter; he just didn’t know how that would work. It was hard enough for him to come to terms with how dearly he loved Felicity. Caring for people made them targets and distracted you from what you should do in some situations. As much as those people made you weak, for caring for them, they made you strong. 

Oliver Queen couldn’t be an island. 

As he rocked his daughter, he wondered if his mother or father had ever sang to him when he was Lucy’s age. Oliver realized that he really never asked his dad about that when he was still alive. Now he felt robbed of that opportunity and of those memories his dad could have shared with him. 

“I know we haven’t had much time to get to know one another,” Oliver told her. “We’re going to make up for lost time, I promise… And let me tell you this, you are not allowed to grow up into a crazy teenager like Thea and I were… You might hate me for a few years, but you’re going to be someone who changes the world… You’ll do good and you’ll do it the right way.”

“You do good too, you know…it might not be the ‘right’ way, it’s just different…”

Oliver looked up and was surprised to see her in the doorway. “I had wanted to let you sleep,” he said quietly. He glanced down to look at Lucy, who seemed fairly content.

“You know you need to burp her at two ounces,” Felicity said as she motioned to Lucy. She slowly walked towards him. “Otherwise, she’ll explode… I’m kidding, well…not exactly… I mean, not literally exploding, but there will likely be throwing up…and it’s not the best thing in the world…” She paused for a moment. “I’m sort of used to hearing her… The noise the monitor makes sort of helped me sleep…”

“You were asleep in here… I just didn’t want you up all night with her if you could get some sleep in your bed,” he told her. 

“You were out late,” Felicity told him. 

“Bad guys didn’t seem to want to go home tonight.” He wondered if she’d been waiting up for him or if she’d just been in there to be close to Lucy. Either way, he felt a little bad. They really were going to have to figure out how all of this was going to work. He needed Felicity at the Foundry, but they couldn’t exactly leave Lucy home with his mother or a nanny… He wanted to have time with his daughter. He wanted Felicity to have time with her. He knew that once they were both back in the swing of things that it would be Queen Consolidated, dinner, and then Team Arrow. It didn’t leave a lot of time for ‘family time’. 

“Sometimes you just have to call it a night too.”

“I’ll remember that…”

“Do you want me to take her?” 

Lucy was out like a light, but he needed to burp her still. He set the bottle to the side and tried position her like he’d seen Felicity do before. “I was going to try,” he said as he gently patted her back. He was scared to hurt her. Lucy seemed so small and so fragile, he was afraid to hurt any of the little bones in her body. 

“You can pat harder,” she said as she sat on the ottoman and faced them both. She just smiled. “You won’t break her.” So, he tried it and hesitated in between at first until Felicity nodded. “You know, I don’t mean to take over when it comes to her… I’m just used to doing it on my own for the most part…”

“I know,” Oliver responded. And he did. Felicity had made it clear and he’d seen it, she was bonded to Lucy and she really was her mom. He could see it. He actually wondered if that was one of the reasons why his mother seemed to dislike Felicity so much, if she didn’t like the fact that this woman that she didn’t know was just stepping in and doing everything for her granddaughter. “I just… I never planned on having a child…”

“I knew you’d make a good dad,” Felicity confided.

“You did?”

“I mean, not when you were all yelling and angry when we first started the Arrow business, but…yeah… You’re so good with Thea… You care about people… You’ve been through a lot and learned a lot,” Felicity told him. “You have so much love to give, Oliver…you just have to allow yourself to open up…”

“That’s the hard part,” he told her.

“I know.”

Oliver paused and almost froze when he heard a sound from Lucy. He looked to Felicity in hopes that she would verify that she’d burped. “Was that it?” he finally asked.

She nodded, her smile a bit brighter in the dim light. “See, you’re learning…”

“I have a good teacher.”

“Don’t you forget that.”

“I feel like someone will remind me if I start to,” he said with a grin. She was beautiful. Sometimes he wondered when he’d started to notice that. It hadn’t been the first thing he’d noticed about her. When they first met, it had been her ability to see right through him…and his bad lies. Later it really was her intelligence that shone through. She was loyal and brilliant and so true. Felicity Smoak was many things and he had just never seen them all at once until now. He didn’t know why.

“She’ll be okay if you lay her back down now,” Felicity told him. “Just always make sure she’s on her back.”

“A couple more minutes,” he told her as he moved Lucy into a cradling position once again. Oliver stared down at Lucy as he spoke. “I keep having to remind myself that she’s mine…that’s she’s ours…” He looked up and saw that she seemed like she was about to argue and then didn’t. Oliver smiled at Felicity and then back down at the baby in his arms. She was perfect and content and such a little angel. “That night with Laurel had been a mistake…but I can’t regret that Lucy came out of it… As horrible as it might sound, maybe I needed the push to know that I could have this…”

“You mean a life?” she teased.

“Sometime more than work…and work…”

“And arrow-ing?”

He grinned at Felicity. “And to know that I could let my walls down…to let some people in…”

“Only some of us?”

“A selected few,” Oliver told her. 

“I’m glad that you’re letting people in,” Felicity said with a warm smile.

Oliver knew that letting people in could leave him vulnerable, but he was sure it was worth it. He couldn’t be an island. He had to let that love in. He had to be even better now. It wasn’t just for himself or Felicity, but for Lucy. He was certain that every parent wanted to be better than their parents, but that was especially true for him. He’d always thought he had the best parents growing up, but now…after everything…he knew that there would have been things he would have changed if he’d been his father. Oliver really hadn’t had to be serious about the world or really grow up, not until he was forced to. He didn’t want Lucy to think that she could be silly and party and fail out of multiple schools. Oliver was pretty sure that Felicity wouldn’t let that happen. On that, he was sure that they would definitely be on the same page.

“Did you ever think about this? Before?” he asked suddenly.

“About what?” 

“Having a family? A baby?” 

“No. I mean, at one time…but not recently,” Felicity rambled. He loved it when she rambled. “It hasn’t seemed right…and I hadn’t met the right guy… Things just never fell in place where I felt that…”

“And now?”

She seemed to smile so brightly suddenly, like the sun. “It’s not how I thought it would ever be,” she told him truthfully. “But I love Lucy…and I love you. I know that there’s a lot to still figure out… That there’s a lot that needs to be worked out. But I wouldn’t trade our family for anything.”

Oliver got up carefully from the rocker and moved to put Lucy down. “You never talk about your family.”

“That’s because you’re my family,” Felicity told him. “You and Digg have been my family…”

“Diggle?”

Oliver turned around after making sure that Lucy was perfectly on her back. He hadn’t expected Diggle to come up in their discussion, but it did make sense. The three of them were always together. How could they not consider each other their family? 

“He’s like your brother… The one that tells you when you screw up…and that doesn’t let you get away with stuff,” Felicity told him.

Oliver felt like he should be offended suddenly. He just stared at her. “I’m not sure how I feel about that description.”

“You should just accept it.”

He held out his hand to her. Lucy was in her crib asleep and the two of them needed some much needed sleep before the little one was up again. “Let me walk you to your door?”

“Such a kind offer,” Felicity told him as she took his hand and got to her feet. They headed towards the door and suddenly Oliver’s hand was on her back. 

He guided her across the hall and really didn’t want to leave her yet. If he hadn’t been out so late he knew that he could have spent far more time with her. It wasn’t even the talking…it was just being together. He missed her. Just her presence was enough for him. “I guess this is good night,” he said sadly. Oliver didn’t mask his feelings; he really didn’t want to leave her. Not yet.

“Stay with me? Until I fall asleep?” she asked.

Oliver found himself nodding. He hadn’t expected her to ask him in. Things were so different with Felicity. In the best kind of way. So, this was all new to him. Unexpected. Beautiful. Wonderful. He followed her into the room and realized that she was still in the skirt and blouse he’d put her to bed in. “I can go if you want to change…”

Felicity just smiled. “You could always just turn your back,” she suggested. 

So, Oliver turned and faced the door in order to give her some privacy. He had to admit though, he was curious to see her. He knew that she was beautiful, but he wanted to see all of her. He remained a gentleman though. 

“Okay,” she finally said. 

He turned to find her in a t-shirt and shorts. He wondered if that was something she would normally wear or if it had been picked up for her. Her hair was down and he was always pleasantly surprised at how different little things could alter her appearance. She was beautiful though. Every time she was beautiful. He didn’t care what she was wearing, how her hair was, whether she was wearing glasses, her make-up, or if she was sweating… Felicity Smoak was the most exquisite woman that he’d ever seen or met. 

“You look comfortable,” he commented as she got up onto the bed. He really did want her to be comfortable and to be able to sleep. He didn’t know how long Lucy would sleep, but he knew that Felicity would want to get up with her when she did get back up. 

She reached out and turned the baby monitor back on and then patted the space of quilt next to her. “I promise it’s a lot more comfortable here than standing there staring at me.”

“The view’s pretty good from here,” he said quietly. And it was true. He could stand there and stare at her all night, in the non-creepiest way possible. Oliver watched as she blushed and looked down for a moment. She was beautiful when she blushed. But he moved from where he’d been standing and made his way over to her. Oliver hesitantly sat on the edge of the bed and turned towards her. The beds in the Queen Mansion were all pretty much king size as a standard. He never remembered sleeping in anything smaller. So, when Felicity scooted over even farther so that there was a whole half of the bed in between them, he felt the need to comply with her silent request. Oliver moved over even more. 

“You sure you don’t mind?”

“There is no where else I would rather be right now,” he told her honestly. She smiled and then leaned against him, one of her arms wrapping around him. He wrapped his arm around her and held her close. Oliver dropped a kiss on top of her golden hair. 

“Thank you, for staying.”

She yawned. “I’m just…I’m not used to sleeping alone… Unless you’re an evil doctor at the hospital who drugs me, then I have no choice and really no recollection of it… But anyways, I got used to someone being in the room with me…and now Lucy is across the hall…”

“Which is why you didn’t stay asleep when I turned off the monitor,” Oliver surmised. He hadn’t thought of that. All of that time, Laurel had been there and then Lucy… They’d all been crammed into that small room… Of course she would be accustom to the sounds of other people… And she’d be acutely aware of sounds from Lucy since she was so used to getting up with her and caring with her in general. 

“Right,” she said. “I’m used to hearing Lucy’s breathing…and occasion snoring…and other sounds she makes…”

“You know, if you wanted…we could break down that one wall and make one of the rooms larger, so that you could have plenty of room and Lucy could share the room with you,” he offered. He didn’t know if that would help things at all or make any sense or difference to her.

“’I doubt that your mother would approve.”

“She doesn’t have to,” Oliver said. “It’s going to be our place… These are our lives… Our daughter… Of course, traditionally you and I would share a room and Lucy would have a separate one…” He paused for a moment as he suddenly started to process what he’d said. Felicity was suddenly just staring at him. He wondered if this was how Felicity felt when she seemed to blurt out things or say things that had other meanings or that were just not what she seemed to mean to say aloud. “I mean, I’m not trying to push you into sharing a room or even—“

“It’s okay, Oliver,” she said with a smile. “I get it…”

“Thank you,” he replied a little relieved. She still smiled. “It’s not that I wouldn’t like it, it’s just that…”

“We’re not there yet.”

“Right.”

And it was good to feel like they were on the same page. He was normally the one who was rushing into things and trying to get to the point where he could have and do whatever he wanted up until the point where a commitment was required. Already, he was committing to her. He’d made a commitment for the three of them to be a family and they were going to move in together.

“I feel like I should be asking you questions,” she said suddenly as he head rested on his shoulder again. 

He put his arm around her. “What kinds of questions?” 

“We’re going to live together. I’ve never lived with you. I feel like I should know more about your habits. I mean, obviously I’ve spent oodles of time with you and Digg, but that doesn’t tell a girl everything… I mean, do you leave globs of toothpaste in the sink? Do you flush? Do you put the seat down? Do you leave clothes everywhere? Are you going to expect me to clean this place? …and I’m going to stop now,” she said after it had been pretty silent between them.

“I think it’s probably going to be easiest just to jump into it and see what works and where we clash…”

“I really hate toothpaste in the bottom of the sink, FYI,” Felicity told him.

Oliver smirked. “I never leave toothpaste in the bottom of the sink.”

“Ten points to Gryffindor,” she joked. 

He shook his head slightly. “I do flush…and I do put the seat down… Sometimes I leave my clothes around on the floor in my room, but it’s not like a whole week’s worth… And I’m not going to expect you to clean the whole house or apartment or whatever we’re calling it… I figured that we could do it together, even though I’m sure that my mom would offer for a maid to come in and clean.”

“Maybe like once in a while… You know to do the deep cleaning,” Felicity told him. “But I like the idea of sharing cleaning chores…”

“Good,” he said with a smile. He had no idea what to use to clean what, but he was oddly excited to learn how it would all work. For the first time, he was excited about moving in with someone and having to do the daily domestic things. Oliver was sure that if it were with anyone else that he wouldn’t be so excited. But it was Felicity, so he was looking forward to it and was in fact, ecstatic. 

Oliver could feel her ease in his arm and hoped that she was relaxing enough to fall asleep. He’d stay as long as he needed to ensure that she fell asleep and stayed asleep. A hand started to run through her hair and he turned to kiss her temple. 

“I’m still awake,” she whispered.

“I know, but you should sleep.”

“How did you know? Besides the fact that I said I was awake?”

“Your breathing…”

“That’s creepy.”

Oliver smirked. “Observant could be another term.”

“I think creepy still works a little better in this situation,” Felicity teased. 

He continued to smile and then shook his head a little. He really had missed her. Felicity really was good at telling him exactly what she was thinking no matter how it could affect their relationship. He was still so happy that he’d not lost her back when she was just working with them for Walter’s sake. He remembered when he and Diggle had to check on her at QC when she was still in IT and he had to ask her back. Thank God she’d agreed to come back. 

Oliver had learned a lot on the island, but he’d learned since coming back that there were some social graces and dating etiquette that he’d lost out on. None of that had mattered on the island and none of it really had much to do with Arrow business. He loved Felicity. So, he knew he’d have to figure things out again. Slowly, he shifted her until they were both lying under the covers, Felicity in his arms.

“Oliver?”

“Close your eyes,” he whispered.

She didn’t argue, but he could hear her breath hitch. 

Oliver pulled her right up against his body and wrapped both arms around her. One of his hands was in her hair while the other moved up the back of her shirt only to rub circles against her spine.

“You’re going to make it harder to sleep…”

“Close your eyes,” he instructed again. “Breathe in and breathe out... Just relax… Don’t worry about anything… You’re safe… Lucy’s sleeping…”

“Oliver Queen is in bed with me,” she mumbled.

He smiled. He was in bed with her, but he was fully clothed. He’d kicked off his shoes after she’d asked him to stay a while, but other than that…layers of clothes. He smiled against her forehead before he kissed it. “Maybe you should get used to it…”

“I could probably learn to get used to that,” she mumbled.

He could tell from her speech pattern that she was getting tired. Oliver was just trying to relax her. If he’d wanted more, he could have approached the situation in bed differently and he’d be far less clothed…as would Felicity. 

Soon enough, she was fast asleep. He listened to her breathing and could feel her heart rate slow. Oliver kept rubbing her back and just waited to move until he felt like she was completely asleep. He didn’t want to startle her. He wanted her to sleep and know that she was safe…for as long as possible. So, Oliver stayed there with Felicity in his arms…all night long.

 

. . .

 

TBC…


	7. Lance Family Times

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's taking so long. I've like killed my wrist and other shoulder. So, I keep trying to rest it. Which means no typing...which means no adding... Which is just super fail. Don't forget to follow me on twitter @shannyfish

Felicity sighed as she made her way down the hallway and towards where she hoped to find Thea or someone to occupy her for the time being. She’d even thought about going outside and looking at the space that Oliver was going to renovate for them. She just needed a distraction. Oliver and Diggle were out at Queen Consolidated and so she knew that she wouldn’t be finding them in the house. 

Her phone sounded, but she ignored it as she made her way outside. She didn’t want to talk to anyone yet. She needed to settle her nerves and just have a moment to really breathe. She knew this day was coming and she knew that she shouldn’t be so surprised by it being so soon, but it was still hard for Felicity to bear.

She made it into the little house. Felicity closed herself into it and moved into one of the back bedrooms. She sat down in the far back corner and tried to keep her calm. It wasn’t possible. Tears fell down her face and she looked down at the phone screen. Oliver had called her and now there was a voicemail. 

They knew that Dinah Lance was coming, but she hadn’t expected her so early. Maybe it was just hard because Moira Queen had been home and had practically banished her from the nursery. Felicity knew that Moira wasn’t very pleased with her, so that really didn’t give her any hope for Moira to say nice things to Dinah about her. Felicity knew that this visit wasn’t about her, but Lucy, it was still hard though.

Her phone rang again.

Oliver again.

She stared down at it as she wiped the tears from her face. Felicity accidentally knocked her glasses from her face, but didn’t care. She put the phone up to her ear to answer. “Hello,” she said with the best voice she could manage.

“Hi.”

“Dinah Lance is here early,” she got out. So far, she felt like she was pulling off somewhat calm. 

“I know, that’s why I was calling… I wanted to make sure you’re okay… I can’t leave yet. There’s a meeting I have to be here for.” 

He sounded apologetic. 

“I’m fine,” she whispered. Her voice broke and she closed her eyes. Felicity’s hand came up to her face and she sighed. “I will be…”

“I’m—“

“No! You stay…”

“Felicity, if it’s—“

“I’m out in our house,” she said, changing the subject. It was sort of nice using the terms ‘our house’. “I’m just going to work on putting all the furniture in one room and maybe cleaning…or something… Maybe I’ll think about paint colors…”

“I can reschedule.”

“It’ll be good for me to focus on this project for right now,” she told him. Felicity didn’t want to sound crazy or hysterical or like she was broken. She just wanted Oliver to do what he needed at QC so he could come home to her. 

“How about if I send Diggle home?”

“It’s not—“ she started to say. Felicity was going to tell him that it wasn’t necessary because it wasn’t. “Maybe that wouldn’t be so bad.” She had a feeling that it would be a good compromise for both of them. Oliver could manage with just QC security watching him for one meeting, after all he was Arrow, and Diggle did make her feel better.

“Okay, he’ll be there soon…”

“Don’t worry about me, okay?” she asked. Felicity didn’t want him to be distracted the whole meeting. She wanted him to be focused and at the top of his game. They needed things to fall back into place. They needed it for so many reasons, but right now Felicity was focused on making Moira Queen happy in any kind of way. “It’s just hard… Things are so complicated...”

“Sometimes complicated is good.”

“And sometimes they’re just harder,” she told him. It wasn’t their relationship. It was their relationship in conjunction with Lucy. How Felicity fit into that family dynamic and for people to accept it. Felicity knew that it really might be too soon and she’d told Oliver that, but that hadn’t helped how she felt about Lucy. No matter what, Felicity had a connection with Lucy Queen, she’d taken care of her for so long…and no one could take that away from her.

“I can’t wait to hear your thoughts about the house when I get home.”

She smiled. She really liked the thought of that. “Are you going to be home for dinner?”

“I was hoping that we could have dinner at the house and then you, me, and Lucy could go to the Foundry… Just to get away from the mansion and my mother… See how it works with Lucy there…”

“I would actually really like that,” Felicity told him.

To get away from the Queen Mansion.

That really would be heaven for her right now.

 

. . .

 

“You know, I could assign someone else to watch Oliver until everything straightens out,” Diggle told her. 

Felicity smiled at him. “You’re the best, you know that, right?” 

He pulled her in with one arm and held her there. Diggle gave her a good squeeze before releasing her. “We all do our part, right?” he asked as he smiled at her.

“Right.”

“You know I could even sleep here for a couple of days…so I’m close by…”

He was beyond sweet. You shouldn’t have to do any of that because of me,” Felicity told him. “Plus, won’t it look odd if Oliver is at Queen Consolidated with someone else? Moira will be the first to pick up on that and say something.”

“When do you care what Moira Queen says?”

“I’ve always cared. She just never talked to me before I started living here…” Felicity told him matter of factly. “Crap. I live here. Don’t I?”

“Is that a problem?”

“No, no…it’s just that…well, I never really even expected to ever be inside of the Queen Mansion, let alone to live inside of it.”

Diggle chuckled. “Will it help when you’re just living on the Queen Estate grounds?”

“Maybe,” she mumbled and then turned her head until her face was buried into his shoulder. She did really feel silly about having him there, but deep down inside she really wouldn’t mind having him there with her for a few days until things settled down. She hoped that things settled down. 

“He loves you, Felicity.”

“I know,” she breathed as she straightened up again. Felicity stared straight at him. “I love him too. When I first met Oliver, I had never—“

“We never intend to fall in love with the people we do, at least not most of the time,” Diggle told her. “Sometimes you just have to wait for the right person to come along…and it’s usually when you least expect it.”

“I never thought that I’d deserve to be loved by someone like Oliver,” she whispered and then stopped. She hadn’t meant to say that out loud. She was glad that she’d said it to just Diggle rather than Oliver overhearing it as well. “I—I didn’t mean—“

“It’s okay,” he told her as he held up a hand. “I won’t say anything to Oliver.”

And she knew that she could trust Diggle. Though she and Oliver probably both confided in Diggle, he was a man of his word. The only reason he’d ever give up something he was supposed to keep secret was if it was absolutely needed. She didn’t know how that would ever come about. “Thank you,” she whispered.

“But for the record, Felicity, you deserve so much… I’m not sure if Oliver is good enough for you,” Diggle told her all too seriously.

Felicity just smiled at him. “Sometimes I wonder, John… If I really deserve so much… If things had been different… It would be Laurel in that house with Oliver…with Lucy…and who knows how many other kids by now… Moira Queen loved Laurel… She would have accepted her into the Queen clan with no problem.” 

“I honestly don’t think things would have worked out so perfectly… We didn’t know Oliver back then,” he said. “We just know what we’ve read or what was on TV back then. He wasn’t the same man that he is now…”

Felicity was quiet.

“You spent time with Laurel.”

She nodded. 

“What did Laurel say about Oliver?”

“About what?”

“About anything?” he pushed.

“Oliver didn’t know about the baby…” Felicity said slowly. Though, of course, he already knew that. “Laurel told me that it was a mistake… She and Oliver—“

“Oliver’s said the same,” Diggle chimed in. 

Felicity sighed. She knew what Diggle was getting at. “She said that Oliver loved me…”

“He does.”

She just smiled at him. Felicity thought about it for a long moment and then paused. “But Laurel loved him too…”

“You can’t keep holding onto that and holding back…or put either of your futures on hold because of that,” Diggle told her. “Laurel and Oliver’s actual relationship was a while ago…before the island…before he met you… He might have still been clinging to it, but that doesn’t mean that it was real. She’s always going to be part of his past and both of your lives, but you need to figure out how to cope with that…without comparing yourself to her.” He pulled her close into a hug again. “Whether you see it or not, Felicity, you are an amazing woman. You are intelligent, smart, and beautiful… It’s why people like Isabel don’t like you…”

“Now you’re just trying to cheer me up,” Felicity teased. She smiled though and stayed in the embrace, wrapping an arm around him as well. 

 

. . .

 

“She’s gone…”

“I figured.”

“Are you going to come inside?”

Felicity shrugged. She’d known that he was there, but she’d felt like hiding out for a bit longer. She and Diggle had moved furniture all into one room and had even worked on cleaning things, at least dusting…and airing out the place. She honestly wasn’t sure if Oliver had plans to knock down walls or if they were just talking about putting up some fresh paint. Diggle had pointed out that the floors probably didn’t need to be redone, but just heavily cleaned. 

“You know you can talk to me,” Oliver said quietly as he sat down next to her. The little house was currently only lit up with candles here and there. Diggle had left when he’d texted that he was there. “About everything and anything….”

“It’s stupid—“

“I’m sure it’s not.”

Felicity looked at him. Handsome, strong, seemingly perfect and yet flawed Oliver Queen… She loved him. “I know that you’re Oliver Queen and that the Queens have a lot of money and everything, but all I can think about is what if they want Lucy? What if they want to take you or us to court for custody of her? I mean…we’re not the best candidates for parents…”

“That’s not true,” Oliver argued.

“You’re supposed to be CEO of Queen Consolidated and I’m supposed to be your assistant… You work long hours at QC and then there’s our night jobs… That’s a lot of time where we’re not home,” Felicity pointed out. “Our lives aren’t exactly normal…or stable…or even safe…”

“But we’re still a family…”

“We’ve always been a family,” Felicity countered a moment later. She sighed. “I guess I’m just worried about how it’ll look…if it were to happen…”

“First of all, you’re right. We have the money and the lawyers that will back any case that comes at us,” Oliver told her. He was softer suddenly. “But on another note… We can make adjustment to work… To everything. We could figure out how to have Lucy at the office some time…or both of us not work as much… And it’s not like we don’t have support in one form or another… And Lucy is going to be safe. Between you, me, Diggle…and my family. No one’s going to hurt our little girl… I don’t want you to worry about that.”

“I know,” she whispered honestly. But it had gone through her head just the same. Oliver had always made sure she was safe… If she’d gotten herself into trouble, he’d always come for her…or Diggle. 

“But Dinah Lance isn’t going to do that. She lives in Central City. She’s going to try to come and visit as much as she can. We’re going to be accommodating… We might even take Lucy to Central City here and there. We’ll send her pictures and Skype or whatever else we have to do for Dinah to feel like she’s included…”

“And what about us?”

“We’re still figuring that out, right?”

Felicity nodded, slowly at first.

“So, let’s not dwell on it… Dinah can’t hold us having a relationship or our relationship with our daughter against us. It benefits Lucy…and I don’t think it’s really going to ever hurt her relationship with her granddaughter if we’re including her in Lucy’s life.”

And it made sense.

Why was it that she just felt so out of touch with things since she got back? Felicity didn’t think it was a horrible thing, but it did concern her a bit. She was overly emotional, but at the same time she’d always been an emotional person. She felt like that gave her certain advantages when it came to the team, at least for them as a whole. They each brought something to Team Arrow. 

“I guess I’m just terrified to lose her,” Felicity finally blurted out. She looked up at Oliver, a bit in shock that she’d come out and just said that out loud. 

“You’re not going to lose her,” Oliver said. His lips pressed against her temple as he pulled her into his arms. “And you’re not going to lose me…or your family…” He was quiet for a moment. “We’re going to get through this together.” 

 

. . .

 

Felicity had fallen asleep in the rocker and had woken up in her bed. She’d woken up to the sound of something on the monitor. Sitting up, she looked over to see that Oliver was sitting in a chair not far from her and seemed alert most likely from the sound as well.

“Did you hear that?”

She nodded. “I don’t know what it sounded like though.”

“It sounded like someone in the room.”

Felicity got to her feet and was right behind Oliver. “It could be your mother,” she said as she tried to think of reasons why someone might be in Lucy’s room. They were hurrying and her heart was beating in her chest and in her ears. 

Pounding. 

Deafening.

Panic raced through her as they made it across the hall. She could see Oliver’s hand on the doorknob. Felicity couldn’t help but worry though. What if it wasn’t Moira? Thea… But what if it wasn’t Thea? She didn’t think that Thea would have just come into the Queen Mansion randomly so late. 

The door opened and they hurried through only to come to a quick halt. When they entered the dark room, they could see a figure standing over the bed, only lit by the light streaming in through the window. Felicity held her breath, but released it once Oliver hit the light switch. 

Her heart started to slow and she felt like she could breathe.

“Sara…” Oliver said quietly. 

Felicity honestly hadn’t expected Sara Lance to have snuck into the Queen Mansion in the middle of the night in order to see Lucy. She knew logically that Sara had to stay out of sight because she was supposed to be dead to the world. Moira and Thea couldn’t see her. But she felt like maybe Sara could give them a head’s up. She looked at Oliver and then suddenly wondered.

Had she?

Did Oliver know that Sara was coming?

Sure, Felicity had guessed that Sara would come, but she hadn’t thought that both Dinah and Sara Lance would be by to see Lucy in less than twenty-four hours. “You scared us,” Felicity said suddenly. 

“Sorry,” Sara said as she looked to them before looking back to Lucy. “I had to see her…” She was quiet. “She’s beautiful.”

“Her name is Lucy,” Oliver spoke up.

“Lucy,” Sara said. 

Felicity wondered what she thought of the name. She also suddenly felt like she didn’t belong there. She’d met Sara once before, but that was it. They’d had a moment where Felicity felt like maybe they’d be friends if they’d had more than moments here and there. Sara and Oliver had a past. Sara and Diggle seemed to have bonded over being soldiers. 

“I should let you—“

“Don’t go,” Sara said quietly as she turned back to face them.

Felicity froze. 

“You were with Laurel…” 

She couldn’t find her voice at that moment. So, Felicity just nodded. She honestly didn’t know what to think Sara might think of any of it. Did she know any of what had happened? Had she found out? Felicity knew that one thing she should know was to fear Sara if she was upset at all with her…if she blamed her for anything. Sara was fierce and definitely someone to fear.

“Before she died, did you tell Laurel…” Sara said and then paused. “Did you tell her that I was alive?”

Tears immediately filled her eyes. Felicity looked down. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She sucked in breath and told herself that she needed to focus on the words. “I was going to tell her everything,” Felicity whispered. She looked up, first at Oliver and then Sara. “I was going to tell her that I knew Oliver was coming because he’s the Arrow…and I was going to tell her that she had to live because she had to see you, Sara…” Sobs overtook her and she couldn’t look at them. She closed her eyes and shook her head. “I didn’t—“ She struggled to get more words out. “I didn’t think she was going to die…not then…” 

Oliver’s arms were around her and she clung to him. She buried her face into the crock of his neck. She didn’t care how it might look to Sara. All she wanted at that moment was that comfort. Felicity froze when she heard Lucy stir and whimper. She held her breath and then wheezed out a sob. 

“Laurel was strong, there was no way that you could have known,” Oliver said. 

When Felicity finally felt like she could speak again, she looked to Sara. “She was at peace…when she passed… Laurel was happy… I didn’t understand it…” She still didn’t understand it. But really, what was the other option? For Laurel to hate life for taking her from it? Maybe there was just clarity at the end… 

“She wasn’t alone,” Sara said. “And I’m thankful for that… I just wish that my father hadn’t been the cause of it all…”

“He wasn’t right.”

“Even if he’s not right,” Sara spoke up. There was sadness thick in her voice. 

“Your mother saw her earlier,” Oliver spoke up after some time. 

“Good… I’m glad that you reached out to her.”

“Of course.”

Sara was silent for a while and looked down at Lucy. “I hear you two are together…” 

“We haven’t—“ Oliver started to say.

“You two are good together and Lucy is lucky to have you both,” Sara said quietly. 

Felicity felt a huge weight being taken off of her shoulders. It was almost as if Sara were giving them permission, though Felicity was sure that Oliver would point out that they didn’t actually need Sara’s permission. It was still nice to hear as far as Felicity was concerned. She loved Lucy as much as if she were her own child, after all she’d cared for her since she was born… 

“I’m sure your mom is overjoyed, Ollie,” Sara said a few minutes later.

Oliver smiled down at Felicity for a moment before turning his attention to Sara. Even though Felicity had been terrified because they’d thought someone could have been potentially breaking into the house (at least, someone they didn’t know) and of Sara herself…it really had gone a lot better than she’d thought. And she was happy to have that moment over with. 

“She is,” Oliver said quietly. “Thea acts like it’s always been her dream to be an aunt…”

“Babies are good for people…” 

“I hope you’re going to stay for at least a few days,” Oliver said. “I’d tell you to crash here---“

“But your mom might see me,” Sara finished.

Oliver just nodded.

“We were going to bring Lucy to the Foundry though…” Felicity said and then stopped. She thought about how horrible that sounded for a moment. “We’re just going to try it… See how it works… If it’ll work…”

“We’re trying to figure out how to structure things so that Felicity and I can spend as much time with Lucy as possible,” Oliver explained.

“Can’t you take leave?” Sara asked.

“I could…but Isabel Rochev is really hell bent on trying to take over Queen Consolidated. I wish Walter was still around at the office, so that I could… But I just might have to move around what hours I’m in the office.”

“We’ll figure it out,” Felicity said a moment later.

“I’m sure you will,” Sara told them. “But I wouldn’t mind hanging out with my niece at the Foundry…if that’s okay? While I’m in town?”

Felicity found herself nodding. “Absolutely…”

“We should get back to bed,” Oliver said suddenly.

“Right.”

“I’ll just stay for fifteen more minutes and then let myself out,” Sara told them.

“Okay,” Oliver said.

“I’ll try to keep quiet,” Sara said with a smile.

Felicity was a little worried to leave, but Oliver guided her out. She knew that the baby monitor was on and that they’d be able to hear anything, but she felt weird leaving the room with Sara there. At least now maybe she’d be able to sleep a little more before Lucy got up. Okay…whom was she kidding? Felicity wasn’t going to relax enough to sleep until she knew that Sara wasn’t moving around the nursery. 

Oliver sat on the edge of her bed. It was a big comfort to have him there. She knew that Oliver would be able to hear if there was anything wrong, baby monitor or not. Oliver would also help her relax, just by his mere presence. She sat down beside him and laid her head on his shoulder.

“You don’t have to worry,” he whispered.

“I know,” Felicity told him. “But I honestly can’t help it.”

“Do you want me to tell you when she goes?”

“Yes, please…”

“You need sleep,” he told her.

“I’m still going to hear her through the monitor… It’s only a few more minutes,” Felicity said quietly as she closed her eyes. A few more minutes. Felicity just concentrated on Oliver’s warmth and how nice it felt to close her eyes for a minute. It was enough to really let her just drift off…

 

. . .

 

TBC…


	8. Awkward Conversations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to just add this even though it's about a scene shorter than the other chapters :)

The morning came and Felicity could hear Oliver in the nursery with Lucy. He was softly singing something to her. She smiled to herself. She didn’t know he sang. So, she took the time to get dressed. It was later than she thought, but not by much. She figured that Oliver had probably tried to keep quiet and keep Lucy quiet for as long as possible in order to let her sleep a bit. 

Felicity had put on a pair of jeans, a button up short sleeve light blue blouse, and a pair of flats in preparation for working on their little house. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail. She had on minimal makeup and her glasses. 

She headed across the hall and then stopped in the doorway when she realized that Oliver wasn’t alone. Felicity hadn’t expected someone else to be in there. It had been so quiet except from Oliver’s singing here and there. Oliver was sitting in the rocker with Lucy while Dinah Lance stood by and just watched Lucy. She was about to just back out quietly when she was spotted. 

“You can come in,” Oliver said softly with a small smile. “She’s not sleeping…she’s just content.”

“She’s beautiful,” Dinah commented like the proudest grandmother in the world.

Felicity smiled. “She really is.” Slowly, she entered and just hoped that it wouldn’t get more awkward. She really had no idea what Dinah had been told by anyone. Felicity was really trying to find her place between everyone else. She knew what Oliver thought, but maybe it was just different because it would feel different when they moved out of the mansion and into the small house. 

“How did you sleep?” Oliver asked.

She walked towards him and knelt down on the other side of the rocker, opposite Dinah, and watched Lucy. “I think that might have been the most I’ve really slept in a while…” To her surprise, Oliver leaned over and kissed the side of her head right in front of Dinah. She really wasn’t sure how to react. 

“When they’re this small, it’s always hard to get enough sleep,” Dinah spoke up. “But I promise it gets better…”

Felicity looked up at her. “I don’t mind it at all. I am just always so in love with her and so happy to have the time with her.”

“I’m understanding that,” Oliver piped up.

They were all quiet and just watching Lucy for a while, but Oliver’s phone buzzing in his pocket broke it. Oliver pulled it out of his pocket with some maneuvering and with a look of frustration. He let out a sigh. “My mother is wondering if we’re going to join her for breakfast,” he said aloud.

“This place is a bit larger than where my kids grew up…I guess it’s harder to just yell from the kitchen,” Dinah said. “Or the dining room…”

Felicity smiled at Dinah’s comment. She really wasn’t sure exactly how things worked in the Queen Mansion as far as the kitchen and meals went. Felicity always figured that Moira didn’t even know where the kitchen was and staff (it sounded better than servant or ‘the help’) made all the meals and delivered them to the dining room. 

“We probably shouldn’t keep her waiting…” Oliver said.

“I should go then, I just wanted to see our little angel as much as I can before I have to go home,” Dinah spoke up.

“No, no…stay,” Oliver said. “Come to breakfast… It’s nothing special… Please… It would be nice to have company.”

“Please,” Felicity echoed. She’d be happy to have someone else there so that Moira didn’t focus on her in any way. Or at least that’s what she was hoping for. She got to her feet and watched Dinah for a response. Please, she thought. It would be nice for someone else to be in the house. Her hope was that Moira would just focus on Dinah and let her eat in peace.

“As long as your mother won’t mind,” Dinah gave in easily with a smile.

“Good,” Oliver said as he got up with Lucy in his arms. “She won’t.”

 

. . .

 

“So, Dinah… What are your plans?”

“My main plan is to spend as much time with my granddaughter as possible before I have to leave,” Dinah responded. 

Felicity had been thankful that so far Moira Queen had only been interested in talking to Dinah Lance. It meant that she could eat in peace and not worry about any arguing between Oliver and Moira. Also, it meant that there wasn’t some crazy scene in front of Dinah. 

“Have you thought about moving back to Starling City?” Moira asked Dinah. 

“This is all so sudden…so new…” Dinah said. “I really haven’t made plans beyond spending time with Lucy… Life has changed so much these last several years…”

“I’m sure it must be difficult…”

“It is.”

There was silence for a moment.

“It must be even more difficult with a stranger raising Lucy as if she were her mother,” Moira said. Her tone was all too kind and casual about it. She darted her eyes briefly Felicity’s way before back to Dinah. 

“Mom,” Oliver said quietly.

Felicity kept her head down and reached out to place a hand on Oliver’s thigh. He was holding Lucy right now and she didn’t think it was a good plan for him to get worked up when he was holding her. Lucy just didn’t need to be involved in the middle of any shouting or fighting. 

“Honestly,” Dinah said. “I’m just glad that Lucy has Oliver and Felicity…that they love her…”

“We do,” Felicity said quietly and quickly, her head raising and her eyes meeting Dinah without thinking. 

“The officers said that Laurel wrote letters…to you, Oliver… I was hoping that you’d let me read them. Since they were addressed to you, they didn’t feel right giving me copies,” Dinah explained. 

Felicity looked from Dinah to Oliver. She didn’t know what all of the letters contained. She only knew exactly what the last one said because she’d been the one who wrote it for Laurel. She had a feeling that no matter who read the letters that knew her, would grieve for her loss all over again but then also feel closer to her.

“I—“ Oliver started to say.

“Even if it’s just one,” Dinah practically begged. 

“Oliver,” she whispered as she stared at him. Felicity was sure that it was hard for him. He was trying so desperately on keeping his mindset on the present and the future, on Lucy and her. She knew that thinking about Laurel and feeling like he’d failed her was almost too much for him to bear at the moment. 

“I—I just…I hadn’t looked at them since the first time I read them,” Oliver finally spoke up. “I don’t know how much they might help you.” He was honest and gentle as he spoke. 

“Did they help you?” Dinah asked curiously.

“Yes,” Oliver replied after a moment.

“I just want to have a piece of that time…”

Felicity knew that Dinah was trying to hold it together as much as she and Oliver were. They were all trying to keep their facades in place. Moira really just wasn’t helping things. “Laurel was…amazing…and unbelievably determined and strong…up until the end,” Felicity spoke up in a whisper. She smiled as she remembered Laurel. She’d cried her eyes out then, but there had been something so serene about her. “All she wanted…all she cared about…was Lucy…”

Dinah started to cry and Felicity hadn’t meant to start an emotional wave at the breakfast table. “You know…Laurel talked about you Oliver, when you were both younger…about this life she thought about… It was never real to me. I never saw it like she always had it planned out… Maybe this is why…”

“Laurel would have made sure that Lucy has the world…” Oliver spoke up.

“I think she already did that.”

“You’re right.”

And they were.

Lucy Queen would want for nothing. She’d be able to go to whatever schools she wanted and attend whatever extra curricular activities that her heart desired. She’d also be able to be spoiled just like a princess. Laurel had made sure that Oliver would get to Lucy and she’d done just that. 

Oliver got up from his chair and handed Lucy off to Dinah. “I’m going to go get those letters.”

“If I could just have copies…”

“It’s okay,” Oliver told her. “I had them when I needed them…”

“But you should have them…if not for you, then for Laurel…” Dinah insisted.

“The police department is going to release the originals,” Felicity spoke up. “Once the investigation is wrapped up.”

“Of course.”

“But it would be nice…if you have photos of Laurel that you could e-mail… Or other things you think that Lucy might have… So she has things of Laurels…” Felicity suggested. “That way she’ll be with Lucy always…”

“That’s very thoughtful,” Moira said.

Felicity turned her attention to Mrs. Queen suddenly with surprise. She really had tried to be invisible. What she’d said sounded like a compliment, but she was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Felicity never got compliments from her unless they were coupled with something else that tended to make her feel horrible.

“I think it’s a beautiful idea,” Dinah spoke up. 

“You know, Felicity…maybe you could help me make copies? Maybe I should have a copy, just in case,” Oliver said.

“Of course,” Felicity said all too quickly as she looked up at him. She knew that he was blatantly trying to save her from his mother and she was grateful for it. She got to her feet and approached Oliver. Felicity turned to Dinah and Moira. “He’s useless when it comes to office equipment…”

“I break things by pushing the right buttons,” Oliver said. He shrugged. “I think machines just hate me.” He paused for a moment. “We’ll be right back.”

Neither Dinah or Moira argued. Moira just looked even more irritated than normal. Felicity wasn’t surprised. She was sure that Moira knew what Oliver was doing. He was doing this for her. Moira really didn’t seem to like Felicity at all. She didn’t understand why. She really didn’t. People normally liked her. 

As soon as they were out of eyesight and earshot, Oliver pulled her into his arms and kissed her temple. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered. 

“I’m okay,” she replied in a whisper and pushed forward a smile. “I think we just have to accept facts. Your mother will probably never like me.”

Oliver stared at her. “She’s going to have to start accepting how things are…and you…or else she’s going to have to live with there being distance between us…”

“Oliver, I don’t want to divide your family.”

“You’re my family, Felicity,” he told her as he stared at her. “Family is more than blood…”

Felicity smiled at him. “I can’t lie, but I’ve thought about you and Diggle as my family for some time…”

“My mother isn’t going to understand our relationship,” Oliver told her. “I know that now. Not very many people are going to get it. They don’t have to. Diggle will. But really, we’re the only ones that really count when it comes to this relationship,” Oliver told her. “Us…and Lucy…”

“I’m glad that Dinah is okay with me—“

“She was overjoyed to know that Lucy has been so well taken care of…and how lovely you are…” Oliver said. “I’m not surprised.”

Felicity just smiled at him. She looked down and then up at him again. “We were going to go get the letters copied…”

“Right.”

She smiled brighter. 

 

. . .

 

TBC…


	9. Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so it sort of decided it was the final chapter. I seriously didn't know until those final lines!

“Are you sure about this wall?” 

“I’m sure.”

“Is she sure?”

“I can hear you,” Felicity told them as she stood not more than three feet away. “I said that wall can come down.”

“Then there will just be two rooms instead of three,” Diggle pointed out. 

“I’m aware,” she said slowly as she stared at Diggle.

He looked between her and Oliver. “Is there something you two want to share with me?”

“What?” Oliver blurted out.

Felicity sighed and wondered if this was really the best plan. It was awkward sometimes when it was the three of them, but mainly because she and Oliver didn’t have a label or a complete understanding on their relationship. If they did, she knew that it would be a lot better (at least for the most part) for all of them. “He wants to know if we’re officially dating…or if we’re just living together…or…I can’t think of another ‘or’.”

“Why does it really have to be so complicated?”

“No, complicated is the kind of rituals they used to have associated with dating way back when,” Diggle said. “You always knew exactly where you still then.”

“I don’t mind complicated…”

“I don’t right now either,” Felicity told him. 

“Okay, okay,” Diggle said and pulled the hammer back and then was smashing the wall a moment later. “I hope you checked to make sure this wasn’t load bearing…”

“I checked.”

“You know, swinging a hammer and breaking down this wall might be good for your frustrations with Mrs. Queen,” Diggle told her.

Felicity just smiled. “Oh, watching you two do it is just as good.” She’d hoped that they’d discard their shirts, but they were wearing them rather tight and they were already sweaty. She couldn’t help, but admire them. 

“I suddenly feel uncomfortable,” Diggle teased and shot her a smile before swinging the hammer again.

She had helped them tear up the flooring, but it had honestly taken a lot out of her. Diggle had already told her to take it easy for the rest of the day. She was still recovering from being held in that room…her body wasn’t used to more intense activity. It was going to take her some time to build up her muscle strength and she was going to be sore. So, now she was resigned to sit back and watch them work for the time being. It also gave her some time to think about how they could decorate the rooms. She and Oliver hadn’t really discussed it. 

“You know…Thea would have a field day—“ Oliver started to say.

“No,” Felicity said quickly. “I think Lucy’s room will already be set once it’s out here.”

Oliver grinned at her. “I thought you and Thea had a good time?”

“It might be more exhausting than pulling up the floor…”

She really didn’t mind shopping with Thea, but they had different tastes and Thea got very gung ho when it came to shopping. Felicity preferred to get what she needed without going through every store and looking at every item before finally deciding on two things. It just seemed like too much time wasted. 

“She knows how to do it online—“ Oliver spoke up.

Felicity interrupted again. “You and I can do the shopping… It’ll be good… Maybe it will help to uncomplicated things…”

“Now look who’s trying to make things simpler,” Diggle teased.

“I thought you wanted me to go for a beer run?” she teased back.

Diggle just grinned. “Are you going to pick up a bucket of pink paint while you’re out, too?”

“Lucy’s room should be checked to make sure we’re not going to have to put new windows or insulation in,” Oliver spoke up quite seriously.

“Who said it was for Lucy’s room?”

Oliver shook his head and then struck the wall again. It was nearly down now. “I don’t care what color the rooms are…”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“You’re really trying to earn brownie points…”

Felicity just smiled at their banter. She loved them. She was so happy she had this family. “I’m going to go and get the beer… Behave while I’m gone.”

 

. . .

 

“As much as I seem like I hate schedules, I feel like we need one,” Oliver said. 

“Maybe you need to think about letting me go out some nights,” Diggle spoke up.

Felicity walked the length of the Foundry with Lucy. She’d started to cry, and though no one could hear her, Felicity still felt the need to calm her down as quickly as possible. She was starting to think that Lucy just didn’t like it there. 

“I never thought it would be this hard,” Oliver admitted. 

Lucy started to calm and seemed content with her walking her. Her eyes met Oliver’s, she’d been listening the whole time; she knew what he was thinking. “Maybe we can’ do it all,” she voiced. 

“We just need more help.”

“We’ll figure it out…it doesn’t have to be this week…” Diggle reminded.

The thing was, would they ever figure it out. This only worried her more when it came to pushing farther… When they thought about her going back to working at Queen Consolidated… 

“Too bad Dinah isn’t moving back… Between her and Sara, we might have a good team,” Oliver said. “I know Dinah works, but I’m sure she’d be more than happy to help out…and then we wouldn’t have to worry about strangers…”

“I think we’re going to have to turn to heavy background checks on strangers, though,” Felicity told him. She wasn’t too pleased with it, but she needed to get out of the house. “If QC was set up differently, I’d suggest on-site daycare…”

“I was thinking that earlier,” Oliver admitted. 

“You know Felicity doesn’t have to be there all the time,” Diggle pointed out. “She could work two or three days a week…and not even full days…at QC and then the rest from home. People have virtual assistants now… It would be similar and then Felicity could still spend time with Lucy.”

“And if we hired someone for part time,” Felicity said. “We could schedule it so was brought to the office here and there… For lunches or those breaks that you should be taking…”

“But you know, if Sara was around…that could make things easier here…” Diggle pointed out. “She and I could take a couple of nights a week… I’m sure we could handle things…as long as it didn’t involve too much hacking…”

Felicity smiled. Diggle had gone on to her about how he really needed her for that. Even though she wasn’t on the physical field like Oliver, Diggle, or even Sara…she had her own thing. They did need her for her skills with computers. She was still starting to wonder how they ever got along without her. 

“I love that you just said that,” she blurted out. They both turned to look at her. “What? I like to be appreciated.”

“Believe me, you are…” Oliver told her. His voice was gentle and sweet and absolutely honest. 

It made her feel more like she hadn’t been gone for all those months. With the three of them, it was easy to pick things up where they left things. Oliver and Diggle didn’t expect her to be caught up with anything. They loved her for who she was and weren’t pushing her. If anything, she was pushing herself. She couldn’t help it, being in the mansion all day long made her feel too claustrophobic and it was far too reminiscent of those months in that room. It made her far too scared and sad and ghosts haunted her…

Felicity needed this. 

She needed things to have some kind of semblance of normalcy. 

She didn’t think it was too much to ask for.

“I guess…let’s see how things go with Lucy here a couple of nights… Then we can talk to Sara and we can figure out about QC and possibly a nanny…” Felicity finally spoke up. Right now, though, she just wanted to ease into things. More importantly, she wanted it just to be them. 

 

. . .

 

“You work fast.”

“Was a bit harder than moving in with Roy.”

“Hey! I’m training him… That takes a lot more work than you can imagine,” Thea told her brother. “Just wait… Felicity will feel my pain soon enough!”

“She already knows it,” Diggle whispered.

She doubted that any of them realized that she could hear them. She’d been at the main house getting Lucy. This was going to be their first night in their own little house. Thea had come for the grand tour, but she and Oliver wanted to enter for this first time as a family.

It had taken them only a week, but Oliver had also called in help. They’d done the demolishing and Oliver had hired people in to check and deal with any plumbing, bathroom, kitchen, flooring, or window issues or installation. They’d ended up taking walls apart and putting in new insulation and drywall. It had all been interesting and eye opening, but she’d loved it. Oliver and Diggle had both taught her things and she’d taught them how to use youtube for help. Things weren’t perfect, but they were close. The walls needed art or pictures, but they’d get to that. 

“We better get in before it gets too cold,” she said and they turned to look at her a moment later. Felicity just smiled. She had Lucy bundled up, but she really didn’t want to take any chances. The last thing they needed was a sick baby. 

“Right,” Oliver said as he held up the key. He unlocked and then pushed the door open. 

“Shouldn’t you carry her in or something?” Thea questioned.

“Isn’t that for when you get married?”

Thea shrugged. “Isn’t this like the same thing?”

Felicity was amused, but hid it. She really liked how Thea tended to jab Oliver. She was positive that Diggle was barely holding it together too. She took a moment to steal a look and he was definitely amused by the Thea and Oliver banter. 

“It’s okay,” Felicity finally spoke up. “I’m good with walking.” Oliver looked relieved. Things really would be a bit easier if things were simpler. She and Oliver were working on it though. It was just going to take time. 

Felicity took a breath in before walking in with Lucy. Oliver was right behind her with Diggle and Thea on his heels. She looked around and even though she’d been in there before, it just looked different. It was so much different than when she’d originally walked into there. They’d talked about not changing it so much, but there was just so much that had to be done. Plus, it was nice to make sure that everything was safe for Lucy. 

“I’m going to go show her her room,” Felicity announced as she walked with Lucy towards the nursery room. She was certain that Thea would approve. It was definitely girly and it was beautiful and Felicity knew that it really wasn’t going to need much updating until Lucy was a lot older. God, she thought, as she looked down at the little girl in her arms. Lucy already seemed so big to her, it made her sad for a moment to think of Lucy as two years…five years…or any older… She was already growing so fast.

“Definitely perfect,” Thea spoke up from behind. 

Felicity just smiled and put Lucy down in her crib. She wiped the bit of tears that had just fallen from her face. She didn’t want Oliver to think she was upset. She was just overwhelming herself with thoughts. It was just suddenly so real.

“Oh! Roy is here with the food! We’re eating out here, right? Is Mom invited?” Thea asked.

“Yes…and yes,” Oliver responded.

Felicity turned to see that Oliver was in the doorway with Thea now. She really wasn’t sure how ready she was for this family dinner, but at least it would be interesting. It always was.

“As long as she behaves?” Thea asked, but didn’t wait for an answer.

Oliver looked at her. “You okay?”

She nodded and put on a smile immediately for him. “I just…I had a moment…” she admitted.

“A moment?” he asked as he approached her.

“I got to thinking about how big Lucy already is… And then I thought about her being older…and I just… It made me so sad…”

“That’s how you know you’re her mom,” Diggle spoke up from the doorway and they both looked in his direction.

“He’s right,” Oliver chimed in a moment later. He pulled her into his arms and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “You need to realize that you really are her mom…”

Lucy’s room was the ‘perfect shade of pink’ as Thea called it. It had all the necessary furniture and toys…and things that she’d grow into. They’d put up white letters that spelled out her name above her crib. Thea had even found a rather large sparkly crown to put above Lucy’s name. 

They’d put up a long frame that said ‘family’ one the left side of the crib which had pictures of Laurel when she was younger, Sara and Laurel, Quentin and Dinah. They weren’t Lucy’s only family, of course, but it made her feel a little better about things. She only wished that Laurel could see how much people loved Lucy and how she was getting so big. She’d overheard Dinah saying on one of the last days that she was here that Laurel was watching over Lucy as she rocked her. Felicity wanted to think that was true. It was a little creepy, but sweet at the same time…to be watched over by a loved one who was no longer with them.

A matching ‘family’ frame was on the left side of the crib, which contained pictures of the Queen family before the Queen’s Gambit went down, a picture with Walter, a picture with her and Oliver holding Lucy, and then a picture of them with Diggle. After all, as far as she and Oliver were concerned…Diggle was their family. She took it all in and knew that it really was perfect. 

 

“I know,” she finally whispered.

 

. . .

 

Dinner had gone along fairly well. Which surprised Felicity. They’d ordered in Chinese and everyone had seemed good with it, except Moira had seemed a bit irked. Felicity had chalked it up to being irked at her, since Moira had yet to accept her and Oliver as a couple let along them plus Lucy as a family. Felicity had kept telling herself, any day now… So far, it hadn’t happened. She was starting to think it never would.

“Oliver went to walk Thea, Roy, and Mr. Diggle inside,” Moira announced.

Felicity nodded. She’d been putting Lucy down and she figured that Oliver just hadn’t wanted to disturb them. After all, she wouldn’t have been very happy if he had and woken up Lucy right when she’d put her to sleep. 

“I promised him that I wouldn’t be unkind to you,” she continued.

She was thinking that Moira wasn’t going to be able to keep her word on that. Felicity had found that Moira had no fear into stating her opinions at all times to anyone who would listen even if her opinions were unwanted. 

“But I have to say… I think it’s time that you and I have an honest discussion… You tend to flee whenever I come into the room or keep your head down,” Moira went on. “How do you think you appear to others?”

“As someone who isn’t going to make an unnecessary scene,” Felicity spoke up. She quietly closed the door and motioned for them to move towards the living room area. If they were going to have this discussion, then at least they could do it away from Lucy’s room. She didn’t want to have Moira waking her up.

“Your only place in my son’s life is as his assistant. The sooner you realize it, the better it will be for everyone,” she told Felicity. Her voice was level and all too calm. “You’re hired help who my son’s grown some attachment to. Like Mr. Diggle. It isn’t love, it’s lust…if anything…”

Felicity wondered if Moira Queen practiced saying such things in front of the mirror before she was actually saying them to her right now. “Oliver and I have been waiting for you to understand that this isn’t something that’s going to go away…”

“How does he introduce you to friends?”

“By my name,” she said quickly. “He doesn’t need to introduce me as his girlfriend or something like that… Our relationship status really isn’t anyone’s business, but our own. I understand that you’re his mother and that you want what’s best for him…but that doesn’t mean that you’re always right. I can guarantee you, you aren’t right about us… If you’d just take the time to get to know me…to talk to me…without talking down to me or like I’m not in the room…or like I’m unimportant, then maybe I’d surprise you,” Felicity told her. 

She took a breath and then continued. “I graduated from MIT. I didn’t set off to be Oliver Queen’s executive assistant. I was in the IT department and Oliver befriended me. I think he wanted someone he could trust when he took over as CEO. I really didn’t even want to take the position. That’s not what I went to school for…and in all honesty, I’ve never had a profound love of babysitting people or bringing them coffee.”

Felicity didn’t stop there though. “I don’t lie to him. We have an honest relationship. I don’t let him get away with being a jerk and I’ve never felt more alive than I have since our relationship changed from just Oliver Queen and IT girl. I thought I’d hate that change, but I don’t. And Diggle, he’s our friend…he’s our family… You might not understand, but you don’t have to. All you have to do is be civil and respect the decisions your son makes. That’s all either of us are asking…”

“Well, don’t you have it all figured out?” Moira finally got a word in.

“And another thing,” Felicity said quickly before Moira could get very far. “I understand that you’re Lucy’s grandmother and that you’re looking out for her, but if you want to continue to be part of her life…I’d suggest you start respecting our decision to be a family. You may not get it. Like other things. Lucy’s my daughter and I’m her mother… Everyone else seems to be able to understand that except you. I want you to be in Lucy’s life, but I won’t have you continue to disrespect me in front of her…or any of the other people we call family. We wanted to be close to you, so that you and Thea could spend time with her and see her grow…but Oliver’s old enough to move completely out and off of this estate. Don’t make me be the one to push for that.”

Moira just stared at her. 

It was then that Felicity realized for the first time that she really took ownership of being Lucy’s mother. It felt good and she had no idea if Moira was about to explode of not, but she’d said what she needed to say. Right now, that was really all that mattered.

The door opened and they both looked over. Oliver walked in and then stopped to stare back at them. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Moira said quickly. “I was just saying goodnight and leaving…” She looked to Felicity. “Goodnight, Felicity.” She turned to her son. “Oliver…”

“Mrs. Queen,” Felicity replied evenly. She wondered if it was obvious that they’d had some kind of heated discussion or if Oliver was just ready to pick up the pieces. The truth was that she wasn’t weak, she knew that deep down. She just didn’t want to make waves, especially when it might divide a family. 

“Mom,” Oliver said in confusion as she left quickly. He closed and locked the door behind his mother and then looked over at her. “What happened?”

“We had a discussion.”

“A discussion?”

“I think I won,” she whispered.

“How do you win a discussion?” Oliver questioned.

“I think she might finally understand,” Felicity said as she looked to Oliver who was finally there with his hands on her arms. She stared up into his eyes and finally knew that they were going to be okay.

They were home.

They were a family

Nothing else mattered.

 

. . .

 

The End.

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure how many people use twitter, but have been considered using it to update people on where my writing is. I'm @shannyfish :)


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